and we all fall .down.

SHOO! Off with ya!

2012-01-14T11:50:00.000-05:00

So, followers who've probably forgotten all about me by now (it's all fine, I would've, too. And to an extent, I did), I've returned to the blogosphere, hopefully with less angst this time, if you're interested.

If you want to follow my life's misadventures, you can find me at upskirt views., my new blog with an as of yet unexplained title. It's a work in progress, but I'm nonetheless posting 'cause I know if I wait, I'll probably become frustrated and procrastinate forever. I'm also going to tell you that my language, if you're offended by that, isn't always the most proper, but I (usually) try to swear sparingly.

So either toodaloo or see you there! <3
Andii.

2011-10-08T00:09:00.001-04:00

I'm kind of considering deleting this... I never use it anymore, and I feel guilty with it lying around here collecting e-dust. I really just have nothing worth saying anymore; nothing that ever happens is interesting; I have no particularly interesting thoughts up in this absolutely useless head, either. I just don't do anything. I've just about quit drawing, writing, and I'm even slacking in the clothes department. It's just not exciting anymore..

Bye guys.

Blah blah school blah.

2011-08-28T20:30:00.002-04:00

I've been attending school for the past week, and therefore have been feeling very drained. Actually having some sort of life after approximately three months of being in a state very similar to that of being comatose does that to you.

Only one particularly awesome thing has happened so far, and that thing would be my first period stagecraft class. Only five students are taking it (but we have company, since Mrs. Broderick teaches musical theatre I and stagecraft simultaneously. Plus we have a sixth ranger of sorts, who takes the class second period, since her first period wasn't free.), so with only six of us, we were each assigned to areas which we will work on designing and constructing within the two plays this semester. I'm the only one who has the same area for both plays, as I had explicitly stated last year when discussing my schedule with Mrs. Broderick that I was very interested in costume design. So that's exciting; we're currently beginning to design the set, costumes, and other things of Wiley and the Hairy Man, which may or may not be the Fall season's straight show.

Other than that, it's school as usual, with weird quotes (currently ranging from "You just shoved a straight man on me!" to "You make speedy Gonzalez look like regular Gonzalez") and relationship angst, and dropping Ali's pack of peanut butter crackers down my classmate Amos's shirt. Ohyeah, fun stuff.

Identical.

2011-08-17T21:49:00.000-04:00

I have a major headache, but I feel like if I go to bed too early, I'll wake up at three in the morning, rather than six. Therefore, I'm writing this post for you! Partially because I also suspect that if I don't write this post now, I never will. You know how it goes.

Part of the reason I have this headache is probably that I read a 500+ page book in one sitting today. ... Well okay. Two sittings. I took a two-minute break to grab a bag of Tostitos. But regardless, I spent several hours lying on my bed reading the book Grandma bought for me today as part of my birthday present, Identical, by Ellen Hopkins.

A friend of mine who rarely reads, save for the Twilight series (... remind me why I decided that if she read a book by this author, I should try it?), loved Crank, by the same author. So, after having scanned through Crank a couple times yet not buying it, I decided to take a chance with this book (it was the only Ellen Hopkins book currently in Wal*Mart), and got it.

I started reading almost immediately after I got home. Hopkins writes her books in free verse poetry, which is definitely interesting and I sort of doubt that I would've liked the book as much, had it been told through conventional sentences/chapters/whatever. Identical is told through the PoVs of identical (hence the name) twins, Kaeleigh and Raeanne, in alternating chapters. The poems read almost like journal entries of the girls, providing more insight into the girls' thoughts than anything else. Their family has been left all screwed up since a car accident which occurred when the girls were eight or nine. After the accident, the twins' mother becomes an incredibly distant politician of a mother, which leaves their father loveless, and he turns to Kaeleigh with a misguided father's love that Raeanne is jealous of and wants, feeling as if Kaeleigh is favored over her.

I won't delve too much into the plot, as to prevent spoilers. Identical is gritty and disturbing, and some of its images just keep seeping back into my mind. I'm not feeling really anxious about it, like with what happened when I first read Thirteen Reasons Why; it's just somewhat disturbing and deals with subject matter such as the obvious incest, teenage promiscuity, drugs, and various other things. It gets kind of graphic, and therefore DON'T LET YOUR KIDDIES READ IT. It's targeted towards young adults, with a "Ages 14+" label somewhere on the back, but I'm not even sure that's accurate. Depends on the teen's maturity, I suppose. Oh, and I was shocked towards the end, with the lovely twist there, but then again, I'm not really perceptive.

Soooo... There you go. That's what I spent my last day of "freedom" doing. Reading a really long, somewhat gritty book. I'm not sure if "enjoy" is the word to use when I talk about how I felt while reading this book. It's by no means happy, but the story, I feel, is very well-told (I'm not a critic, guys... I like most things...) and I will probably be checking out more of Hopkins's work. I have to give the author props just for crafting a 500+ page story entirely out of poems. I find that impressive.

Anyhoozles, man, I have school in the morning and it's almost ten o'clock. I hear bunches of schedules were messed up, so pray/wish/demand to authorities that my schedule hasn't been changed. That would be such a pain, because I feel my schedule was as perfect as I could make it the way it was.

Whoah, Guys.

2011-08-17T08:29:00.001-04:00

School starts tomorrow. I, miraculously, have woken up before noon, presenting some hope that I might not actually miss the bus tomorrow, as I so often do. That's about my only worry, missing the bus, in contrast to those on Facebook who keep complaining about drama and whores and inability to trust and basically how high school = Hell.

I'm kinda low-key and/or entirely oblivious, so I think they're making far too big a deal out of it. I woke up this morning and some chick I used to be in plays with says she wants to slit her wrists over it ~~and I am not sure I doubt that.~~ What'd MAKE it that bad, I have no idea. Inability to cope with minor things? I dunno. I'm attempting to not sound insensitive, but I really don't get it.

Gunna get rich!

2011-08-16T18:34:00.001-04:00

Sometimes I believe that there are drugs in my blood and that I am therefore constantly high. There is no other explanation for how I come up with some things.

Seth called me the other night. I'd somehow taken a late evening nap and so it was about nine and I was really tired when he called. We decided that Pokemon condoms would be a profitable idea. They're trading cards with a practical use! GOTTA CATCH 'EM ALL! Seth wishes for Poochyena to be the unofficial mascot of them, but I'm not sure why. April and I think Jigglypuff would be better considering, hey, it's Jigglypuff.


C'mon guys. You can't NOT associate this with condoms.

I'm also supposed to buy every significant male in my life a box of condoms for Christmas. Luckily, I only have a couple of those. Seth said if I give my dad a box, that he'll pay me twenty dollars, but I'm not entirely such a thing is worth it. That's too awkward for me. Faaaar too awkward. No just no ughhhhwaaaaa my brain just shut down.

I also learned that blowjobs are controlled by fate, but I don't remember much about that aside from that's what happens when I mishear everything.

In other news, most people I actually like spending time with are always busy on my birthday. So I will probably spend my Sunday like all others. Go to church, come home, waste my life away online.

Of Things that make Various parts of me Hurt.

2011-08-10T01:29:00.000-04:00

I've been here in Baltimore since Saturday before last. So far, I've managed to acquire some very painful sunburn which is now peeling and not painful, merely unsightly, some swimming skills (only the simplest), three new books, a new acquaintance, and Ali has threatened to shove herbs up my virtual Night Elf ears.

And I'm also quite easy to distract. I started this post over a week ago. Like last Monday. Ughhh life is taking over my life. That's not necessarily a bad thing; I'm actually quite enjoying it.

The first couple days here weren't too particularly eventful, just life as usual. I've been living up to my childhood nickname "Baby Fungus" whenever Ali's home, and when she's not, I'm usually either reading, sleeping, playing WoW, Skyping (I feel as if something is wrong with me.), or at the pool. Yeah man. Pool. I have conquered it. N'really. Nonetheless, I can actually swim now! A little. And my face has to be in the water, which isn't all that convenient for seeing where I'm going. If the goggles are missing like they were today, then I risk hitting my forehead against the pool wall, like happened today. It felt like I had a bit of a scrape there at first, but as of now, my forehead feels like usual, or what I assume usual feels like because I don't feel my forehead all that often. When I do it feels like.. Acne. I think. And I am oftentimes insecure about my forehead, but I don't wish to discuss that. I'm not giving you any opportunities to judge my forehead.

On either my first or second trip to the pool, I underestimated the amazing power of SUNLIGHT on my skin so pale it was comparable to that of a teenage girl's image of a dangerous, huggable vampire, and managed to acquire sunburn on my thighs, shoulders, arms, back, nose, and cheeks. Needless to say, I was not a particularly happy camper. Although realizing the sunburn would eventually become a tan and I would NOT be mistaken for a fairy/vampire hybrid on a daily basis was pretty awesome. I'm still not as tan as my sister or nieces, though. I could never be as tan as Alenya and KK. They're so brown, they're.... There is no metaphor for this. Now my skin is peeling, and I don't really like wearing tank tops because the peeling on my shoulders and back is incredibly obvious. I don't care if I'm at home or in public, I absolutely HATE it when people see the more unattractive parts of my body. Which, depending on your tastes, may or may not be all of it. We're not here to debate that (or are we? Feel free to praise my luscious body in the comments.).

I've also been nerding out enough to play World of Warcraft. I don't really care if it's ubergeeky (I don't consider it to be, but some do), destroys families, and/or has subpar graphics and a weak combat system, I enjoy it and don't die as much as my sister. That'd be because she's a squishy wizard. I couldn't play as a mage to save my life. I'll stick with my druid, thank you very much. Ali's picked up the professions of herbalism and alchemy in-game, and so her friend Spring (who has four absolutely adorable boys all out to steal the hearts of every girl in the world because they are SO. ADORABLE. AND SWEET.) and I have been asking her about how her flower-picking is going... To which she yells "HERBS!" and once again follows the little yellow dots on the minimap. Then gets depressed when she doesn't have enough skill to pick a certain ~~flower~~ herb. Poor big sister...

Last on the list of things that I recall happening, I actually met someone today. His name's Chance and he looks a lot like Nicole's ex-boyfriend Jesse. I nearly told him this, but then decided that saying "You look like one of my friend's many exes. Heeeeee was a douche." wasn't entirely suitable for an introductory conversation when Ali kicked me out of the house to go talk to him (which, yes, was PAINFULLY awkward). Neither was "I've been eye-stalking your brother around because I saw the two of you at the pool yesterday and he had tattoos that I couldn't quite make out. I would've politely demanded that he take his shirt off the next time I saw him, but he's not a minor and that means I'm the one concerned about stranger danger. Especially because yesterday I decided his smile was either pretty or pedophile-y. I haven't seen it again to decide for certain." It's been suggested by Sandi (who was the person enthusiastic about me meeting Chance and Trevor [the sibling with tattoos] in the first place... Told her no various times before today because I abandoned social skills for the internet and wearing bunny ears...) that I'd get along better with Trevor than Chance (I don't know why she thinks this). I doubt I'll find out. I'm not making it a priority to, at least.

In other news, I think I'm goin' shopping tomorrow! Woohoo! CLOOOOTHES. Oh, be right back, I need to clean up the massive pile of drool that leaked from my mouth upon thinking about clothes. Cheap clothes, hopefully. Expensive things make me wince. And cry. And feel like a horrible person. I spent all my money on books this week, too.

Friends? I have FRIENDS?

2011-08-01T14:02:00.000-04:00

Ali came over last Tuesday evening; I invited her over because Emma and Ava were staying the night for Alenya and KK, and I felt lonely. So we had a nice night of reminiscing and idiotic ideas. Before they went to bed, all four girls decided to invade my room and the six of us had an epic pillow/pants fight. I felt like Emma was gonna kill me. I can't handle seven year-olds trying to beat me up with a pillow! MY BODY IS TOO FRAIL FOR THIS TOMFOOLERY. Then she kept flipping the lightswitch on and off, and I was so confused. I decided to do jumping jacks and make "mooooo" noises. Ali and I needed glowsticks, man. And maybe some LSD.

Since the last time I posted, we'd both watched Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. I'll make a separate post dedicated to it, 'cause it'll probably be lengthy, but anyway, we decided that Matthew Lewis is our sex slave. Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint, the Phelps twins, and etc are all beautiful, but Matthew Lewis for some reason just appeals to us like no other. It could be because he comes off as dorkier than his fellow actors. Ali doesn't seem to normally go after the dorky/geeky boys like I do, but Matthew Lewis is an exception becaaaaaaaaause.... He's Neville. And Neville became awesome over seven books. We're sharing him because it seems to be our version of "bros before hoes" to engage in polyamory rather than pull an "I want my best friend to be happy" for the sake of actors who will never know of our existence. By the way, I am VERY DISAPPOINTED in the lack of "I'll join you when Hell freezes over!" in Part 2. Very.

Since boys seem to be a staple of teenage girl conversations, Alex's dating life and his magnificent manwhore ways also came up (of course!). Alex seems to be one of those people who will forever remain relevant. People come and go, but manwhores I had a crush on in seventh grade are forever, maybe? I talked to him the night after that, but one thing at a time here. We also brought up her cousin Chloe's little thing with her boyfriend, "I'm a koala bear and you're my eucalyptus tree!" and Ali decided to translate over to "I'm the Pope and you're my altar boy!" because Jacob's Catholic... And you know what they say about little Catholic boys... Although Jacob's not exactly little (nor, as far as I know, is he any sort of altar boy or whatever). But you get the point. I need a Pope cane, man...

We also ended up bored and looking up astrological birth charts. I made fun of Ali a lot because hers implied that she was very sensitive and whatnot, things which Ali, outwardly, at least, is not. Then we decided that my Venus-in-Cancer-given "emotional feelers" are amusing. I have feeeeeeeeeeelers! FEAR THEM. OR BE ATTRACTED TO THEM. I unno.

Then, the next day, I went to Nicole's for her birthday. Not going to get into why Ali didn't go because that could cause... Rifts. Rifts deeper than the ones already in existence. Gary, aka the Paco from middle school that caused me much grief and laughter then started homeschooling, that kjgnvlkdfdl grrrrrrrr, was also there, so of course this was crazy.

To be perfectly honest, Nicole's younger sister makes me feel grateful for having the nieces that I do, and also thankful that I am NOT the older sibling. I know how Ali felt now when I was a kid, and I feel kind of awful for her. Kind of. Nicole's little sister, Kaylee, is hypertalkative and I-can't-think-of-a-better-word-than-whiny-let-me-get-back-to-you-on-that. I had noooo idea how to deal with her, 'cause Alenya and KK generally aren't so shadow-y. That may have something to do with Alenya and KK being close in age and therefore being able to play together and relate to each other better.

Nicole, Gary, and I ended up being geeky as somewhat normal and playing Xbox. They own those, so they know what's going on, but I'm perpetually confused and suck at Xbox games... I passed on playing CoD because I fail so hard at it (Gary: "It's okay, you don't wanna be good at Call of Duty, anyway. It's kind of a n00b game."), but I did play some Left 4 Dead with Nicole, and managed to be the only party member to not die, because Nicole/Zoey commit suicide at the beginning of the finale, and I/Louis refused to go save Bill and Francis because I didn't wanna die. Not going near the tank without a bomb. Not a chance in Hades. We also watched some of the webshow "The Guild," and oddly enough, within the next week, I would start playing WoW on my sister's account. It's pretty addictive.

And of course the obligatory running around like idiots and sexually harassing each other. "Gaaaaaah you've been talking to your Sexbox boyfriend for five minutes now and ignoring meeeeeeee. I want ATTENTIOOOOOON" *gropes.* And awkward hugs, carrying Gary around because he weighs less than me, playing with Nicole's kitty, Waffles McMeowmeow, aaaaaand trying to get through the movie "Rubber" by claiming that I find random things (e.g., a tire slowly crushing a water bottle) erotic. Then I got mad when the bunny died, though. I like bunnies, you don't kill bunnies.

Gary and I both stayed the night at Nicole's. Gary left pretty early on Wednesday (well, I consider it early. Nicole and I both went to bed late because she was talking to her boyfriend, and I was discussing the logic behind balancing strawberries on nipples with Alex. We concluded that it would be a difficult feat, and when I talked to Seth about it, he agreed. Strawberries just don't like being on nipples. Maybe the whipped cream would help 'em stay in place, but none of us have ever tried. Not saying we wouldn't, because we're some of those people who'd get bored and do something like that (we find the concept too hilarious to be sexy.), but we haven't. Nicole, her mother, her sister, and I went into Oakland to play around and so now I have new duct tape (hot pink!). We also ate at Denny's, and our waiter had an absolutely heavenly voice. I wanted to take him home and make him read nutritional labels to me. I told him instead that he should narrate audiobooks. See? I'm sharing the audio erotica! I also discovered what appears to be a Hello Kitty Peep on a stick in Candyland. I haven't eaten it yet. But I'm really really tempted.

It's been a busy week since then, so I'll tell you tonight or so about it all. I'm currently in Baltimore, with no clue how long I'll be here.

I learned a new, irrelevant word today: Clowder. Like "I hope a clowder of cats runs you over and claws your eyes out."

2011-07-22T01:48:00.002-04:00

I would get my period on Simon's birthday. So would. Stupid manboything gives me cramps. Urrrrgh, I have WORDS for him. Especially because we, while capable of holding a civilized conversation, cannot do so without becoming sarcastic. I don't expect us to be on awesome terms after the catastrophe that ensued after we broke up, but it irritates me when he gets lippy at me, partially because it's still civilized. I don't want to blow up at him when he starts being sassy, because he might tell my sister or something or whatever that I'm still being a bitter and awful person (by the way, his ex-as-of-a-couple-weeks-ago hates me and wants me to be run over by a bus. Go figure), because then I get to face her and feel dumb about my actions.

*sigh.*

It makes me wanna stomp on his face in my supposed hooker boots. Speaking of hookers, I found the Filipino hooker skirt that my sister gave to me in seventh grade! Mom had hidden it from me either at the end of eighth grade or the beginning of ninth because it's really short (but still close in length to most of my other miniskirts), and I finally found it in the garbage bags full of clothes in the hallway next to my room. I was gonna leave them alone, but nopes, I found my miniskirt, I had to look. The only other thing I found that I wanted was a green World of Warcraft t-shirt, my "Green Linen Shirt."

Back to boots, I need a new pair of hooker boots. Mine are deteriorating. But I'm really specific about the type of heel they have. Regardless of their eye-gouging potential, I don't really want stiletto heels. That's too hooker-y. At The Purple Fiddle Sunday, there was this one chick there with these really nice boots, and Seth was pokin' fun at me because every time she would walk by, I couldn't help staring at her boots. Although later on she was dancing and that ended up with me leaning over to Seth, whispering "Is it bad that I'm having a difficult time not staring at that chick's ass..?" which prompted him to double over in laughter, then reassuring me that that was most definitely her intention when she got dressed in the morning, then went back to being doubled over, face on the table when I mentioned that her boobs were also very distracting. I CAN'T HELP IIIIIT.

No, older sister, Jacob didn't seem offended by this. He laughed at me and asked if he was allowed to check out other girls. At first I told him no, because I would become jealous, but then I changed my mind and told him that he could, but they had to have my approval first, so we could check them out together. It's a bonding activity!

Do not want to title this.

2011-07-19T20:01:00.000-04:00

You guys ever been to H-Mart? It's like Asian Wal*Mart, carrying all your Asian food product needs, along with cookware and random jewelry. And it still carries that teeny-tiny Asian market smell, thankfully. I wouldn't consider it seriously Asian without it. I went there with the family on my last full day in Baltimore the week before last. I also found this lovely herbal tea labeled "Horny Goat Weed." My friend Courtney had found it several months beforehand in her local drugstore, so I ended up Googling it, and I believe it to be an aphrodisiac. However, that leaves a pretty big question: How the heck are goats relevant? *eye twitch.*

The nieces have been here for the last week or two (I can't count, don't ask me). Obviously I haven't gone too insane yet, but I may be on my way there. I am the farthest person ever from being a nurturer. Oh, and I guess either Thursday or Friday, Mom, Alenya, KK, and I will be going to Pennsylvania to see Auntie Susie (Ate? Auntie? The two terms are too similar, but I think "Ate" stands for older sister. Meeeeehscrewit I speak English.), 'cause my cousin Cat and her son are in for a week or so... Ali, you must feel so lucky right now.

I shall prove everyone wrong by not withering away and dying without internet access.

New Respect for Banjos Now.

2011-07-18T15:19:00.000-04:00

Yesterday, I went down to The Purple Fiddle with my friends Seth and Ben and their family, 'cause Ben invited me over for his eighteenth birthday, although I kinda wonder if he did it more for Seth's sake than mine, because while I'm friends with both half-brothers, I'm closer with Seth. I have this sinking suspicion that their family's always thought that Seth and I have a thing for each other, and I don't even know how to deny that. Probably shouldn't try, because no one'll believe me. For around a year and a half now, no one has. Grr.

The Purple Fiddle often has live musicians, and apparently Ben had been interested in seeing a Phillip Roebuck, a one-man band whom I won't even attempt to classify genre-wise. He plays a bass drum, tambourine, and banjo simultaneously. The banjo's self-explanatory, and as for the tambourine/drum, playing them is somehow accomplished by stomping. I believe there's something on his foot connected to the drumstick, and it's probably the same for the tambourine. I was being observant, I swear, but I still didn't entirely figure it out. Either way, I imagine playing all those for long periods of time, and Seth wasn't entirely sure that Roebuck was human. He hypothesized that if we were to drive a sixteen-wheeler at the man, he would survive unharmed. I told him he wasn't allowed to do this; running over people is bad. Here's an example of the man playing.

Live, it's all intense-y. You can really feel the drum. We were reaaaaally close to the stage. From what I hear, Purple Fiddle's usually packed, but there weren't very many people there last night. Ben says that's probably for the better, 'cause we could actually get a seat!

At the beginning of the show, I somehow managed to cut my tongue... Yet the only thing I'd eaten was a waffle cone with cake batter flavored ice cream, and I'd stolen some of Seth's tortilla chips... I'm still trying to figure out how this happened. Anyhoozles, the show was in two parts, as the musician took a break in between. While this was going on, Seth, Ben, their aunt Holly, Christie, and I decided to go play cornhole, because in the area outsidenext to the venue-thingie, there was a set for it. Google it if you don't know.

This resulted in me almost being hit by flying beanbags several times (thaaaanks, Christie), pelting Seth with beanbags and nearly losing one in the shrubbery, failing lots and lots, and me yelling "YOU HAVE NO MASCULINITY!!!" at Seth for reasons I don't remember. I suck at cornhole. The bags always slide off the thingiemajiggie. ... I'm so eloquent, wow.

I swear, this was the first outing I've been on this summer that was non-family related. I'm trying to make Ali and/or Cassie come here this week, and Nicole's birthday is soon, so hopefully I'll be out a little more from here on out. "Hopefully" being the key word there.

In Which Andrea does two Unexpected Things.

2011-07-07T15:43:00.000-04:00

I think I'm going to the pool later with Sandi and my lovely nieces. I really don't like pools/swimsuits/water/etc/I will not say sun, because I do like sun, just find most activities taking place in the sun boring and/or impossible for my wimpy self, but I'm going every other day, for Mom's sake, since she gets irritated with me and my selfish supposed hatred of everything when I don't.

I attempted to read Twilight this morning. I'm too lazy to spend valuable time ranting about Twitards these days, especially since the hype seems to have died down, but I must admit to having some preconceived notions regarding the book; I've always figured that I would hate it.

I can't say I hatehatehatehated it for as far as I got without forcing myself through unnecessary effort (about 130 pages); I'm not preparing a bonfire as I type. I just found it really boring... It's been 100 paaaaages, can we get to something exciting now please? And I feel really bad for the boys who pine after Bella. Mike/Eric/Tyler dears, you could do better than the girl lacking in personality who only thinks that boys who act all weird in her presence are worth her time. Fer serious. Jacob had barely been introduced once I decided I had to quit, and while he didn't seem so bad, TvTropes and a little knowledge of the sequels (noooo, don't imprint on her KID, man... D: ) already kinda ruined him for me... No, don't end up obsessed with her, she's dumb!

I want some plot. Now. I WANT EXCITEMEEEEEENT. I want a protagonist who isn't constantly referring to her clumsiness! Or talking about how Edward looks and how he's downright maddening YET SHE WAAAAAAANTS HIM. OR ACTUALLY TRYING TO CARE ABOUT HER PEERS AND NOT JUST TOLERATING THEM BECAUSE SHE THINKS IT MAKES THEM FEEL AWESOME TO BE IN HER PRESENCE. If I wanted a perpetually angsty and somewhat snooty protagonist, I'd read about myself!

Bella Swan must die. Everything else, I can tolerate so far (but I hear it gets worse). I posted about my endeavor on Facebook, and I have been encouraged to read The Host by Ali, Lee-Ann, and Aaron. So I suppose I'll give it a shot, seeing as how I hold these people, and for the most part, their literary choices, in pretty high regard. Ah well.

And I'll conclude this by saying: Harry Potter ftw, guys!!! ALWAYS. Speaking of which, can anyone else not believe that the movies are finally coming to an end? It's hard to imagine such a series, one that has captivated people worldwide, is finally finishing up. It's crazy! I really want to see Deathly Hallows, Part 2. I probably won't see it on opening night, because I imagine a lot of people are gonna be seeing it. I'll probably see if Jacob wants to come (even if I wanna see this too much to bother making out with anyone in the movie theater seats, which, btw, is inconvenient, what with those drink-holder armrests.) as I haven't seen him yet this summer and keep whining to myself about missing him (I can't whine to anyone else regarding missing him, because it makes me feel clingy). So guess I've got that to look forward to, unless he runs off to yet another reenactment or has band camp. He needs to stay put for a week, geeze! Dx

My night, in a sentence.

2011-07-03T23:23:00.001-04:00

Ali is currently buttraping the other female members of our household.

I'm awake. It's not noon yet. What insanity is this!?

2011-06-30T09:53:00.000-04:00

Besides that Dad was gonna yell at me some more if I didn't start getting up earlier... As I have said many times lately, though, I am just as productive, yet much less snappy whenever I am asleep. Although I'm considering devoting a lot of today to redrawing pictures that suck, yet still have potential, so I suppose I just contradicted myself there. I just realized I could've waited until the end of today and showed you my ever-so-not-really-amazing work, but I guess I can make a new post or edit this later, because I am DETERMINED to post this so I can get my butt off of here and back upstairs. I can't do my art down here because Facebook is too tempting, boyfriend off in Gettysburg or not.

Oh. So Aaron and I decided that, as he's entirely stoic and cold with occasional bipolar tendencies, and I am hyper and spazztic when suddenly, BAM! week-long angst session, we would probably make awful parents (bringing up parenting again, really? I did that the other day, too. I'm becoming a little concerned.), and therefore WE SHOULD TOTALLY RAISE A KID TOGETHER.

I pity that kid. So hard. He/she's not gonna last two years. He's (I just decided that it can't be female. I dunno why.) gonna get taken away while Aaron's... Doing his Aaron-type emotions-blocked-off-by-Great-Wall-of-China thing and putting weird things in his pork roast, and I'm hugging toasters in the bathtub.

Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

2011-06-29T19:17:00.004-04:00

Wanna rent my brain? Wanna borrow my consciousness (as if you didn't have such already, otherwise you wouldn't be reading this)? Want all the things I have preventing me from becoming a comatose vegetable for the next three months?

I'll lend them to you, free. In fact, I should probably be paying you for them. Trust me, I won't miss 'em. If I were in a coma, I'd have about the same summer experience, minus any realization, and consequently lamentation, of just how much I love it. Which is obviously a lot.

WTF is that a Sparkly Shirtless man on my TV?

2011-06-27T18:25:00.001-04:00

So I was walking over to the bathroom to take a shower last night, and when I passed through the living room, Mom and Dad were watching America's got Talent, I was nearly out, then suddenly "IS THAT A SPARKLY SHIRTLESS FLAMBOYANT MAN ON OUR TELEVISION!? I gotta watch this.."

That is a horribly unflattering screen which you choose to have a still, video. Anyway.

My mind was shattered. No, I am not turned on. I am nonetheless astounded. My mother and I were debating whether he should've been allowed to go on or not. Mom said no, for that sort of "talent" (she used a tone which implied that pole dancing is something everybody can do like that and that it's a pointless skill) is not supposed to be on public television. I disagreed. I knooooow that pole dancing is supposed to have lots to do with sex appeal, but I don't care. I didn't consider it all that sexy. Just impressive. Talent is talent and I consider it an art. An art that would be impossible for me to ever do (I asked Jacob is he would pole dance for me. At first he said maybe, if sparkles weren't involved, then he told me no. Biggest disappointment in my life so far.).

However, it's still sort of debatable as to whether this should be allowed on family tv like America's Got Talent or not. One on hand, in a society where ten year old boys playing Call of Duty (not picking on it because I suck at it; it was the first example to come to mind) is considered normal, I don't see why anyone should have any qualms about flamboyant sparkly pole dancers on television. I'm not sure which one I'd be more open to, were I a parent. Probably the pole dancing, to be honest. This is among the many reasons why I am not a parent, and aim to never become one. On the other hand, Call of Duty has an M rating for a reason. Whether parents will disregard this or not is up to them. I think America's got Talent has a PG-TV rating. I'm not sure. Pole dancing might not exactly be a PG-rated thing.

OPINIONS. I want them.

To-do List for Today.

2011-06-27T14:21:00.002-04:00

In no particular order:

~~Make blog post.~~

~~Put dishes away.~~

~~Do rest of dishes.~~

Put rest of dishes away.

Harass Jacob until he sends ref pic.

~~Harass Jacob because I know the above isn't going to happen.~~

~~Attempt to clean room.~~

Give up because I have no idea where the heck anything in my room which doesn't have a specified place already goes.

Work on Face's Todd-and-Octopus drawing.

Draw more boys in dresses.

~~Discover music which isn't simply catchy as heck, and actually has meaning.~~

Procrastinate on most of this by talking to people on Facebook.

~~Eat. Eventually. This probably won't happen, either.~~

Put clothes away.

Write poems.

~~Ask Lauren how her publishing-quest is going.~~

Attempt to work on Lauren's cover art.

Lament that Lauren chose me to do cover art when I'm not all that awesome.

Be emo about poems.

~~Think about how sister would smack me. Then tell me to stop being emo.~~

~~Emo about that.~~

~~Call Jacob because it (usually) helps me stop being emo.~~

Not fall asleep until four in the morning because that's what always happens because I can't convince myself to close my eyes until I'm on the verge of passing out, as I seem to be convinced that a serial killer will come murder my family and I in the night.

And the process repeats, seeing as I won't have finished any of the significant things on this list. I'll come update it at the end of the day and strikethrough the things I've accomplished.

My one and only Voyage into Anything Remotely Grimdark..

2011-06-20T20:05:00.001-04:00

Gonna tell you guys right now that I may be the biggest wuss ever. Make fun of me all you want.

Last night, I was playing around on "Know your Meme," and this thingie regarding a certain My Little Pony fanfiction known as "Cupcakes" showed up. I figured it couldn't be all that horrible. So I decided to go look at the Google docs version which was up and realized there was a lesson here:

When the story can be labelled as "GRIMDARK AS F*CK," don't read it... Not if you're like me... And have a weak stomach. No more ponies being dismembered and made into cupcakes for me. ~~Why the heck did I do it in the first place. Whyyyyy must I be THAT DUMB.~~

I then proceeded to call Jacob about how I feared I would have hallucinations of an overly excitable pink pony turning my intestines to cupcakes (and this took many, many tries seeing as cell phone service wherever he was fails), played Guitar Hero, continued working on my list of things to do at Jacob's wedding, and when I couldn't sleep for like hours because this little gut feeling that the ponies from the attic would be surrounding me when I awoke (and thank God I never ever possessed one of Pinkie Pie.), I read Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants (and will probably continue to do so for the next week). Lol. Why, me. Oh why. I did eventually fall asleep while reading, though, without nightmares! Wooooooo!

No link. Find it yourself if you want it.

Motherhumper....

2011-06-20T16:32:00.000-04:00

Happy late Father's Day, not that I think many fathers read my blog... My friend Lauren and I realized it's technically Official Motherf*cker (the one swear word I feel the need to censor?) Day, seeing as, y'know... You screwed someone who then became a mother... And as my sister Ali has said, the term is not an insult. IT COULD BE ONE OF THE GREATEST COMPLIMENTS EVER BESTOWED BY SOMEONE WITH LACKING VOCABULARY SKILLS. *shakes passionate fist.*

I had bought my dad several CDs at a gospel sing which I was taken to a couple weeks ago by my Sunday School teacher... Definitely not my idea, but I won't deny that I enjoyed it. Dad likes gospel, and I can work with some of it, sooo winwin situation right there, because I pre-approved this group. I also wrote Dad a letter-in-a-card... I am incapable of sentimentality, so in my little letter I pretty much just told Dad that I have never liked asparagus, I pity him for having to tolerate Mom, Ali, and I; he is and will always be a princess, to please never ever shave his mustache because I will not recognize him without it, and that he is awesome. And that I love him. On the other side of the card, there was a drawing of Dad in a princess dress and tiara, with an upside-down cow above it.

Hallmark is banging down my door right now, begging for me to produce cards for them.

Eavesdropping is Depressing Business.

2011-06-12T23:25:00.044-04:00

I can hear my mother and Sandi, Ali's mother-in-law, in the other room. I caught a little bit of the conversation and it was somehow mentioned that I 1) can't listen, 2) am really dependent, and 3) church just came up, and I've come to dread attending church as of the last several months. I really just am not comfortable with church and religion. I've been given no reason why I should believe in Christianity other than it's Heaven or Hell, and if I don't love some sort of omnipresent deity that I honestly do not feel the presence of within my life, then I'm screwed and it's off to Hell I go.

I won't deny that the concept of that scares the living daylights out of me, but I can make myself care for maybe a couple hours, then I shove it to the back of my head 'cause not a damn thing makes sense. Church isn't informing me of anything, for the last several years all I've really heard is that America's going to Hell for it's hedonistic and immoral ways. And it's not even the violence, our ways of destroying ourselves, which is being mentioned, it's the gays and the lovers outside of marriage, our ways of loving each other. Why bother going if I'm going to hear the same hate and depression over and over again?

I have tried to tell my parents that I don't wish to attend church, that I really feel like I need a break, but they are not having it. I don't think that either of them really believes that I might not believe in God. Mom seems to think I'm making excuses, and really just want to stay up all night on the computer and not have to wake up early in the morning, and when the topic came up before, she pretty much said that if I didn't believe in God, I would be immoral and disrespectful (wait, aren't I already that?) and etc, and that because I wasn't a whore-y, rude and violent delinquent, I believed. Not quite sure how that reasoning works. As far as Dad goes, I haven't a clue what he thinks.

I've breathed a sigh of relief every time I missed church for whatever reason as of late, and I feel horrible for it, but it's something I am barely making it through anymore.

I Think my Mother is Drunk.

2011-06-11T22:25:00.027-04:00

OWWWW just ran over my foot with the spinny-chair's wheel...

So, tonight's my third night in Baltimore, and today was Alenya's birthday party. I miraculously managed to avoid hiding upstairs under the bed like a cat, but nonetheless, being within crowds (especially when a good portion consists of children) freaks me out. I guess it went well enough; however, the preparations for it were a paaaain and everyone, especially my dear sister Ali (poor thing), was stressing out. It got to the point that on our way to pick up decorations, Ali started screaming about how everybody in her family irritates her, and it was actually pretty amusing.

"You never said anything about Dad..."
"DAD IS PERFECT. And that pisses me off..."

Her reason to be frustrated with me was that I'm a fungus. Tsk tsk, such prejudice...

Right now, I guess as some sort of stress-reliever since the past few days have been so insanely hectic, the adults remaining awake (which would be all of them, sans Dad, who is sleeping in Alenya's princess bed. However, he refuses to let me call him a princess. I don't see the big deal, but he threatened to delete me from his Facebook and revoke my computer privileges if I edit pictures and place a tiara on his head. I think he's insecure and really should get in touch with his inner princess. IT'S HEALTHY.) are playing some variation of the drinking game "Fuzzy Duck," and I can hear them in the other room. They sound like pretty happy people, and, as the title says, I think my mother may be drunk.

This is gonna be an interesting night, if one that I am excluding myself from.

1:00 AM needs to be a more entertaining time.

2011-06-10T01:48:00.000-04:00

Self-explanatory title. I'm currently in Fort Meade at my sister's house, on my sister's MacBook, wondering why the heck I bother staying awake right now if there's so little to do. I'm kind of attempting to hold a conversation with Alex, aka my highly supportive manwhore, but he's in and out right about now, and not helping my boredom much.

I don't understand where the idea that all females want a gay best friend came from. Were I to be around a stereotypically gay guy for excessive periods of time, I would likely become immensely frustrated and hide from them for weeks.

I was going to try and explain that I've come to realize that I'm quite fond of having a manwhore-y friend and the pros of this, but right about now, I'd much rather say "screw it," and just sleep.

Zombie Pancakes

2011-06-09T15:17:00.012-04:00

Lately I've been having a lot of dreams where I end up raped and shot or near-raped and near-shot. I'm not sure what to make of these, but that's not the point man. Guess I'll tell you right now, that if I die, I LOVE YOU. BAM, pedophile-bullet to the forehead seems to be my favored form of dream-death, but last night I had a dream about the zombie apocalypse.

Somehow, my dad and I were trapped in some sort of diner with various other people, only one of which I recall at this point, and that person was my World History classmate, Lenzi, who worked there. But it somehow got brought up that Lenzi spent like all her time working, for whatever reason. I assume college payments.

Anyway, it's dangerous outside so Dad keeps telling me that I can't go out and I was all "KJHGBSDKJHKDJSD FUUUUUUUUU-- IMMA BE FINE," I assume because I'm an idiot like that. And I don't remember a lot of what happened after that.

My gym classmate, J-d, who I have spoken to twice, tops, yet have dreams about on occasion anyway, at one point near the time where I woke came into the diner and wanted pancakes. I don't remember how I reacted within the dream, but when I woke up and reminisced, I was not pleased with him. We're all about to die, AND J-D WANTS MOTHERFRIGGIN' PANCAKES.

An Entire Summer Of...

2011-06-08T17:08:00.009-04:00

I don't know what I'm gonna do with myself for the next several months! For one thing, it's so fruggin' HOOOOOT and all I wanna do when it's hot like this is sleep. And maybe when it rains ('cause that happens a lot), I'll strip and run down the road naked and screaming. Then I'd end up electrocuted, 'cause it does not merely rain here, it storms. I don't care too much for thunderstorms. So I'll just sleep.

Unrealistic Expectations?

2011-06-07T01:01:00.029-04:00

Ho. Ly crap. I come back a couple hours later and EVERYTHING'S DIFFERENT, MAN. Whoah.

How bad is it when you find pictures from back in January of you and your Links classmates, and you have somehow forced bunny ears and various other feminine accessories onto your future boyfriend, and someone (I believe it was Rhea) has clipped his hair back somehow, and then you're looking at a picture and you're like "why the heck does this feel so familiar..." then it hits you: There's an absolutely adorable anime character that does this!!111!!!1!one!!!11! kawaii desuuuuuuuuuuuuuu <3 <3 <3 and then start comparing pictures to see that, perhaps, if you dyed the boyfriend's hair, he would resemble said anime character (Oh God no this is a bad idea already)?

Obviously, that just happened to me. I came to the conclusion that no, there is no hope of Jacob ever vresembling Tsubasa Amaha. Here's a little comparison for you.

Resizing totally killed quality right here... And maybe I shoulda purple-ized hair right there. But it's 1:30 AM, and I'm lazy. (okayokay I checked. Purple's not Jacob's colour.. Like at all...) So yeah. Never look alike. Ever. Evereverever. And no, Jacob's not smiling 'cause he's happy. He does that while feeling embarrassed, and I'm almost certain we had tied up his hands (I believe with bandana we'd previously blindfolded him with... We're horrible people), 'cause there was no way ever ever ever that he was willingly doing this. He'll let me duct tape him to a chair (only once. And in public 'cause I think he's scared I'll rape him otherwise), but he refuses to wear bunny ears. I think it had something to do with his dangerously low number of man-points. Like seriously, the boy may very well be in man-point-debt.

I CAN'T FIND THE POST--h nevermind. I think the "post" button's up there.. NO IT'S---oh. Bright orange button up top. Nevermind again.

If I don't start consistently blogging, my sister will kick me in the ovaries.

2011-06-06T16:26:00.000-04:00

And nobody wants that to happen, do they? Even though I think she's still going to, anyway, for some mind screw that got pulled about a week after my last post.

But anyway. She keeps telling me to blog, and I'm like "suuuure I'll get around to it eventually," but today she was all "Go blog now dammit!" because she's at work and bored, and I don't have much school left and no longer have much of an excuse.

Btw, I managed to pass all my second semester classes, even physical science honors, with an A! I'm such a proud little stupid person right now, 'cause I soooo didn't want to take a final in science. I did manage to acquire a B on the end of course exam, though. A very very low B, mainly 'cause I'm Moses-like slow.

I don't really like to blog that much anymore because I don't feel like an entertainer... Seriously... Go read my sister's blog or something, she's the funny one... Right about now she would once again be kicking me in the ovaries and telling me to stop being an emu. I dunno. Whenever I'm happy, I'm too obnoxious for everybody. Whenever I'm anything else, I'm emo. I don't like emotion. You'd think that as a self-proclaimed-but-I-never-ever-feel-like-such-anymore artist, I would embrace emotion. But no. I get to analyze every little freakin' thing to where I'm suspicious of and hate it all.

THIS IS WHY YOU CAN'T LET ME BLOG ANYMORE. GAAAAAAAH IUHGDFK.

Oh. Somehow acquired (I don't like that word. I don't care right now.) a new boyfriend. This one's Jacob, and he's been mentioned here briefly before, but not in detail. He's not the total antithesis of Simon, but they're still pretty freakin' different people. Which, obviously, is perfectly absolutely fine. This's been going on for about three weeks tomorrow, although the week before we clarified what the heck was going on, nobody was quite sure if we were dating or not. Not even us. Mainly 'cause, in what were the most adorably awkward twenty minutes of my life so far, Megan and Rhea somehow had to coax Jacob into asking (by yelling at him to "DO IIIIT," and then roaming around the room refusing to speak to either Jacob or I until he manned up and did it, while I had to act like I didn't have a hunch that this was going on), and then later that day I had to ask him about it 'cause he was far too hesitant for me not to be suspicious and turns out he did it mainly due to pressure but he DID wanna ask, just not yet, so then we decided to wait and then like a week later he re-asked (and didn't take twenty minutes), and ummmm... Stuff. And um no guys, this wasn't exactly sudden-ish, Jacob and I've known each other for about as long as Simon and I've known each other, maybe a week less.

I'm going to my sister's this weekend, for Alenya's birthday. Maybe something good'll happen there.

Wooooo Life.

2011-05-04T16:49:00.000-04:00

Oh hai guize. Um, I'm single now. I break up with a guy one day, within the next three he has a new girlfriend. Day-uuuuuummm, I am the easiest girlfriend in the world to get over. And is it WRONG that that stings the already broken, bruised, and seemingly nonexistent self esteem a little bit? I mean seriously. I must've sucked as a girlfriend. No one's quite sure how Simon and his new girlfriend connect in such a relationship, anyway. We're so entirely befuddled, the rest of the world and I. But hey, ain't my problem. He ain't my responsibility anymore.

On the upside, I can now guiltlessly have dreams which I cannot control (I had another one last night, about a guy in my Spanish class I never even think about),ask people to make out with me (and they all turn me down) and change my gender on Facebook to male! Yaaaaaaaaaaay!

Plus we had a going-away party for the Spanish student teacher (sad face, though, considering the leaving part) and I did a good presentation about Sodium Iodide today during first period! That cancels out all confusing things about today.

Mom's in Baltimore, too. This is day three out of five-or-so which Dad and I will be surviving without her. NO ONE BELIEVES WE CAN DO IT, BUT WE WILL!!

2011-04-25T18:47:00.000-04:00

I had these two weird dreams a week or so ago regarding random guys I know. Like I don't know (ooh, cheesecake. Be right back) them all too well, but they've shown up in my dreams for no good reason whatsoever and were all... Bwargh. First night it was Big!Seth, second night was J-d, the third night I predicted Jaocb would be in my dream, but instead I had a dream about failing auditions for a musical. And by failed, I mean failed. I failed horrendously.

There's nothing much else that I really want to talk about. I realized that lately, regardless of what happens, I don't much want to describe it or talk about it or anything.

I think I may be happy challenged.

"Emo" is Politically Incorrect. Oh, and Turtles.

2011-04-14T18:54:00.000-04:00

I was wondering if there even was a politically correct term for "emo," and I couldn't think of a well-known one, so I just decided that "angsting, hormonal, idiotic teenager who does not know the joy of sunshine, growth, and bright colours," would suffice. Random thought for today.

Friday, my parental units and I left to Fort Meade to visit Ali and her family. Her mother-in-law was visiting, too, as Ali's husband, Kevin, had a vasectomy performed that week. I wasn't angsting throughout this little excursion, so Ali didn't have to yell at me and tell me to be like porcupine balls, unlike the last time we saw each other, when my hair was cut, and I felt very much like a poodle.

Instead, this time we deduced that we both post rather odd things on Facebook a lot, our family is crazy, our mother will not take sheets to the beach, and according to the zodiac, Mom and Dad shouldn't have lasted thirty years. Not that we're complaining.

Second day there, we went to the Baltimore Zoo. However, before we could reach our destination, we had to pass through the ghetto, or what I assume to be a ghetto, but am not entirely sure because I had never been in one before. Either way, I saw a total of three Caucasians within the area, and parts of the place looked rather run down... I was weary of the place; because I felt really out of place and it kind of seemed like somewhere you'd get shot if you ventured into it during the nightly hours. Mom brought up during this trip that she never sees Filipinos in trouble anywhere, it's always blacks and Mexicans (... She said it. Not me.). Ali and I tried to use they're-prostitutes-and-no one-wants-to-arrest-prostitutes-especially-cute-little-Asian-girls reasoning.

The zoo had pretty much three sections: The Maryland Wilderness, African Safari, and a Polar Bear section that also had some other arctic-type animals. Like an adorable little Arctic Fox cuddled up inside a log.

We first went through the Maryland Wilderness section, which also had various kid-centric thingies, such as those swingie-bridges which Ali and I couldn't resist jumping on, little turtle shell thingies we could crawl into and spin around in, slides, and etc. Ali has the majority of the pictures. There was also a portion that was a petting zoo containing several farm animals. I had to hide from the cows, for I was worried that they would take vengeance upon me. There was a Jacob Sheep that I need to upload onto Facebook to tag Jacob in (and he would later argue that he is not a sheep. I beg to differ. He's a sheep who likes to take my fruit.) and two donkeys that were absolutely adorable, and very very friendly. I had a rather interesting experience with the goats, though.

So the part of the petting zoo with the goats is an area you can enter and brush and pet the goats. Well, we were walkin' around brushing all the little goats, but for some reason, one of the goats just came up to be and started rubbing his/her little head against my tights, which were uber-sparkly (when Ali had seen me before we left she spent at least five minutes staring at and playing with my tights, comparing my tights to Edward Cullen). So I was standing there, bewildered, when one more goat comes up to my legs, and then another. So I'm being mobbed by goats, two of which are rubbing opposite sides of my legs to prevent my escape. It was all very odd.

There's nothing else I really feel like describing, so here, have some pictures. And then it won't let me post anything after them. Fummel.


Ali and I are convinced that this is an ANCIENT TURTLE MATING RITUAL. We have to go confirm it with Simon, though.

I believe this is self explanatory, and also why I love my family.

AHHHHH GOATS. :o

We <3 wall.

Pained turtle.

OTTERS. CUTECUTECUTECUTE.

Donkey. Very friendly donkey, at that. So cuuuuuute. Like the otter, ha.

I realized that, in my encyclopedia of animals, penguins' weirdness is only exceeded by that of platypi-or-whatever-the-plural-of-platypus is. They're just so AWKWARD.

This has a name. I do not remember it. He/she's like a hybrid of a horse and a zebra. Therefore, I call him/her.... Zebra-butt. Very creative, I know.


Alenya's gonna ninja the squirrel. But then... Squirrel out-ninja'd her!

Help a girl out?

2011-04-11T20:22:00.000-04:00

So I'm doing a project on the effects of media violence on society. To enhance this project, I have been conducting a survey. If you would like to help me in my quest to not fail at this, then here are my questions. If you do not wish for the community which follows this nearly-dead blog out to see your answers, you may email me at yukionna86@gmail.com, mmkays? I shall warn you, there is bloody and potentially objectionable content ahead! Your input would be highly valued.

Now, away we go!

1) First off, what age and ethnicity (list specific ethnicities if you are mixed, please,) are you?

2) What sort of visual media are you most exposed to (e.g., video games, television, books, internet, etc.)? You may pick more than one.

3) Do the forms of media you watch often include violence, and if yes, is it portrayed in either a comical or dramatic manner?

4) Do you believe that violence as a form of entertainment has jaded our society to the point where violence, even in reality, does not bother us because we are so used to it?

5) How about violence in informational media, such as the news?

6) Do you believe that the portrayal of any sort of ethnic group/age group/social class/etc. within media as violent affects society's views of that group to where society believes them to be inherently violent? If yes, which group(s)?

For this next section, you're going to be given a set of pictures. Rate each picture on where you believe it falls on a scale of 1-10 violence-wise, considering 1 as not at all violent, and 10 as horrifyingly violent on a scale to which I have effectively ruined whatever innocence you have left.

Gahd, they're so SHINY.

10)

11)

Thank you very much for your time, the help is appreciated. <3

I swear I will get around to that zoo post. I swear it.

Posts that take a week to write.

2011-04-06T21:23:00.000-04:00

I hate them. I really do. I have one before this one and I can't be bothered to finish it because it just irritates me. Plus I don't like posting pictures, but my zoo post feels incomplete without them, NOT THAT IT'S EVER GONNA BE COMPLETE IN THE FIRST PLACE. D:<

Tomorrow is opening night of Penzance; I'll be staying after school with EmilyH. and Simon and possibly some more people to play some Hunter Hunted before call time or something. We'll find someway to entertain ourselves.

My Pencil is Hungry. For some Man.

2011-03-24T19:31:00.000-04:00

Monica got moved today during third period Spanish. It was a tragic event, as this means Tasha and I get to make less stupid jokes, because Monica generally instigates them.

I've taken to sitting around drawing random guys in my classes. I think the desire to either stems from Todd once telling me that I never drew males, or I am just boy crazy. Of course the former is much more likely. :p Today I attempted to draw that guy who reminds me of frogs. I failed. Massively.

And I have been attempting to draw Alex for around two and a half years now. I've tried to maybe a hundred times since the start of seventh grade, and I still can't do it correctly. My most recent attempt was foiled when I started on his figure, and because I did that before I drew clothes, Tasha kept telling me that my drawing needed clothes, so I ended up giving in and drawing a bikini-thing on it, complete with apple-prints on the top. ... I'm currently wondering if the bikini might actually make it more accurate (*cue seventh grade squee.*).

Flash-backing. Last part. I Promise.

2011-03-23T21:47:00.000-04:00

So, this will have been my fifth post today. Two are flashbackies that I found in post history that you may or may not want to read. The other two are one) me complaining about life, briefly, surprise surprise, and the other is a reintroduction., even though after I wrote it, I realized I am exactly the same as I always have been. Except I seem to be more angsty.

Let's face it, I am the patron saint of angst. So, anyway, what other things have happened which I can just state and leave you to ponder how the heck they happened? Here, these might come up later:

ROTC boys somehow seem somewhat fond of me. I'm not sure why.
I met someone new in Spanish, her name is Monica. We tend to sit in the corner with Tasha (yes, from theatre) and Jessica and laugh hysterically about entirely stupid things, such as similarities between Spanish words and different terms for a penis. Yeah yeah, we're such mature people. Oh, and Monica is the girlfriend of tall-Seth. The one who's full of happiness and sunlight and hilarity, if that tells you anything.
I met someone with the name "Jacob" that I actually don't hate.
I have a gym classmate that makes me think of frogs. This will likely come up quite often, because April and I tend to crack jokes about him a lot. It's not like it's a bad thing, he just... Makes me think of frogs.
Science sucks. Aside from the rare moments, such as Ms. Warnick going on about the good-looking man she saw outside her window 4th period yesterday, or me somehow managing to coordinate my outfit with my science project board. Entirely on accident.

And I have nothing else right now. But I must post more. And do homework. And post more. And not stress. It's been really difficult for me to keep up with things lately, and I've been freaking out for a while now. Nyles (oh yeah, we began talking again after forever and ever and ever and awkwardness because I'm not obsessed with him anymore [even if he's still really super duper uber pretty]!) says I'm gonna get a tumor, while Misty thinks I need some sort of mental health day.

And Lauren thinks I'm depressed. I am not depressed, dangit.

FLASHBACK: Part Deux! Science Homework, how I Abhor Thee.

2011-03-23T21:29:00.000-04:00

Seriously. I spent nearly three hours outlining a section in my Science book. Is that a NORMAL amount of time? Am I not supposed to be so irate about this? Should I attempt to develop a longer attention span?

I don't even like Earth Science... I am SORRY, seismologists and etc worldwide, but I do not care for your sciences. At all.

So, you missed my lovely wonderful Aaron crossdressing. Yeah yeah, we somehow started talking again. Not very much, though. He prefers the more social/entertaining/positive people on the bus. However, somehow, he ended up in some leggings, boots, a skirt, tank top and nice jacket thing, make-up and a pretty heart necklace about a week ago. I have pictures, but a deal was made that they would not be posted online. However, we are allowed to e-mail them. :3

I thought it was incredibly ballsy, even if he was called to the office due to reports of threats of violence against him, then made to change clothes. By the way, he has nice thighs.

Aaaaaand the day after that, during third period (Spanish II, in the computer lab), we went under a "code orange," going into lockdown then evacuating to a place that shall not be named here. Unfortunately, my jacket and lunch were in the theatre, aaaaaaaaaaaall the way across the building. And I could not retrieve them. So, when we went outside, waiting for a bus, I was freezing. And hungry. Third period = lunch, man...

We never quite figured out what a Code Orange really was. I heard that it covered environmental issues, or fire/air toxins/car toxins (which is up the same alley, really). A lot of people thought we were under a bomb threat (and considering on of the bathrooms, a female one close to my World History classroom, was roped off when we returned to the school [only to leave shortly after], I wouldn't be surprised) which was miscoded. Then I heard of another, which showed colours as a ranking system.

Black = "Break out the suicide pills, we're not gettin' out alive."

Red = "We're screwed."

Orange: "We're somewhat screwed, let's get outta here."

Then, from my ever-lovely Links teacher, "CODE ORANGE DOESN'T EXIST!"

I like this theory, too.

Oh, did I tell you? Simon and I ended up both auditioning for Penzance. I think he may be our only natural bass in the cast, and if he's not, then he's a baritone. Either way, it amused me to hear him sing. Or hear the suggestion that he could be a "secret tenor" hiding inside that really deep voice.

Andrea: "Oh no..."

We had a pretty epic first rehearsal, too. The cast is split up into three groups: Pirates, Beautiful maidens (and Christoper, the Major-General), aaaaand Policemen. I'm a policeman. All three groups, as an exercise, were to work with the scenario of a cat in a tree.

Pirates: *encounter cat on a stump.* "Look, it's a cat in a tree! What do we do!?" Pirate King: "LET'S GET THE RUUUM." Chaos ensues, including Seth and Emily J laying on the floor clawing at the stump, Emily H... Like dying, aaaand Face attempting to eat the styrofoam "cat."

Policemen: *come out drunk, singing Tarantaraaa! See cat.* Strategy one: Have Tasha jump on Abby's back. No go. Strategy two: Have Amber jump-kick ("I'm gonna be like Michael Jordan!"). This also fails ("My mother runs over people like you!"). However, in the process, Amber kicks me in the foot, and I start yelling about how I'm a casualty, tell my mother I love her! and the rest of the police formulate our master plan: POLICEMAN PYRAMIIIID. So with three on the bottom, two in the middle, and one on top (we had an extra person. So we had Latisha be all drunk and walk over to the cow we had placed onstage and ask it help us save the cat), this fails. We are now frustrated. Therefore, NINJA RIFLE SQUAD.

Cue dead cat noises.

Then a bevy of beautiful maidens. Their father, the Major-General, is patrolling a tree. So this gaggle of girls comes runnin' up, pointing out that there's a kitty in the tree. By girly-girl let's-not-get-dirty-climbing-the-tree reasoning, they assume a rain dance will make it fall from the tree. No go. Then realization: "AHH IT'S A CAT. IT'S DIRTY OR SOMETHING." Have one girl throw shoe and the rest run to the (apparently adorable) kitty, and the girl who threw the shoe: "My shoe!!" Girls run offstage with cat. And their father, who has been watching this the entire time, goes back to patrolling.

I can imagine the next few weeks are going to be... Very interesting. To say the least.

FLASHBACK: Part one! La La Laaaaaaa.

2011-03-23T21:15:00.000-04:00

So I'm trying to catch up. This means posting junk from a long time ago that I never finished. Like this. There's another. Then I'll just go over one or two things that may be significant. Hopefully we will get somewhere from there.

I don't see why Facebookers don't just give up already. Face it, we are NEVER getting a 'dislike' button. Deal with it, man.

So the last couple of days haven't been too great, but I'm feeling mostly better now. Friday I saw Tron Legacy with Simon. Stupid plot, pretty shiny graphics. My reaction was mainly this (spoilers ahoy!): I HAVE A STRONG PERSONAL ATTACHMENT TO TRON THANKS TO KINGDOM HEARTS. NOW STOP MAKING ME THINK YOU KILLED HIM BUT REALLY BRAINWASHED HIM, FAKE-KILLING HIM AGAIN THEN MAKING HIM HEROIC SACRIFICE BUT POSSIBLY FOR REAL REAL KILLING HIM. D: *wibble.*

I was depressed... I also met Simon's family. They may very well be as weird as mine. I'm not too sure what to say about the whole ordeal..

Then back to school. Ah man, Monday sucked cheeseballs. I forgot several papers, lost my ID ~~in the driveway, somehow~~, aaaaand just... It all-around was not good, save first period, where we listened to the Stagecraft class perform their "radio shows."

Basically, the radio shows are productions the class makes in groups of around three, which rely on voice rather than action to show what is happening. Each person had to play at least three characters, and make them distinctive. One of the shows had an dream-world Mrs. Broderick (our theatre director), who sounded like a black revivalist preacher and ordered her Stagecraft students to traverse to the Land of Hardee's to order sandwiches WITH EXTRA SAUCE and to paint the theatre backdrop with it. Then they encountered... A manslave? I was lost by that point. All I could figure out was that it was hilarious.

Tasha, Macy, Seth, and I's involved an abducted toddler, a detective, the obligatory southern belle and black guy (the latter of which was me [and no seriously, most of the radio shows had at least one southern belle and/or black guy]), aaaaaand a false lead who may or may not have been hanged in the late 1800's. I was also this false lead. It was... Interesting. To say the least.

Let's try this Again.

2011-03-23T17:56:00.000-04:00

It's been over two months since I have told you anything whatsoever, and since then, everything feels like it's been going downhill, and I'm not the person I was. So, allow me to reintroduce myself.

The name's Andrea. I like clothes; they never seem to disappoint. I'm full of angst and stress and all that teenage BS, and I apologize for that, because I hate it and hearing about it, too. I used to be a writer, an artist. Anymore, I don't think I'm anything. I wear bunny ears and like to think I'm occasionally funny. I'm lazy and never post anymore because I'm too inconsiderate to realize you all want to know about my absolutely riveting life. And every time I try anymore, I get interrupted.

Oh, and I have a boyfriend-thing, too. I know he can very well read this, and it's been five months and I haven't made up my mind, but sometimes I still wonder if he's really worth the trouble. He probably wonders that about me every day, anyway.

And after typing that, I realized that I haven't changed a bit.

This Perturbs Me.

2011-03-23T17:14:00.000-04:00

So I had about a bajillion things happen between last time (not counting failed vlogging. Freakin' camera.), but every time I tried to write about them, the post became incredibly long, because when one thing happens, it tends to end up being really long and my attention span is too long to bother to finishing it.

Like when I had no life (Science and theatre are two very conflicting full-time jobs), I had plenty of time, and nothing to say. Now there's too much to say, and no time!

I'm not sure which I prefer.

In Which you get to hear Andrea's Fairly Annoying Voice.

2011-02-03T20:51:00.001-05:00

Yeah man. I'm too lazy to type (plus I have homework to type up), so I made you a little vlog-y type thing so you can catch up on the fabulous life of moi. At nine minutes the computer said "shut up you airheaded motormouth," and automatically shut off before I could properly bid you adieu. It made me so sad. By the way, man, my camera is of sucky quality. Therefore, this sucks. But I am audible (unfortunately for you).

Oh it's refusing to upload. Screw the thing right now.

Why hello There, Second Semester.

2011-01-19T17:02:00.001-05:00

It's crazy, man... First semester, I thought what we had was SPECIAL. *pouts.* I have Science Honors, Gym, Spanish II, and World History Honors. I'm kind of wondering if I'll actually make it through Science Honors. It's probably lucky that I won't be acting in The Pirates of Penzance, our next play, otherwise I'd probably die. The Spanish teacher kind of reminds me of my mom...

So yeah man. I passed all my classes with a ninety or above. And considering the heck Geometry was putting me through, I feel sorta accomplished.

For the love of all that is Grammatically Correct (as if I am).

2011-01-18T17:49:00.000-05:00

I cannot bring myself to do anything... For some reason, I just feel empty. I know I should be happy with what I am and what I've got, and I don't mean this all material-wise, but it seems like I can never be content with how my life is going. I'm always trying to chase after the biggest and best and feel like I'm being tied down by actually interacting with people outside of school. Maybe it's a good thing I'm being tied down, but lately I'm just frustrated. I can't commit to one thing because I end up neglecting it for whatever else strikes my fancy and it just screws everything up... I can't maintain a relationship; I'm too flighty and apathetic toward life and just distant. I should've realized that before I got involved in this. I am not emotionally mature or whatever... Geebus, I'm like a four year old... And so I feel like an idiot for letting this happen.

I hate myself for wishing this, but I want to go back to the personality I had in sixth grade. Anti-social, studious, and obsessed with video games and manga.

Paranoia dreams.

2010-12-29T23:36:00.000-05:00

So this morning, I either had a dream or woke up with no shirt on, put it back on without really questioning, then dropped back off to sleep. Then I woke back up several hours later and was very confused. It felt very real, but why the heck would my shirt be off? I went to sleep with it on. :/ So I've been panicking. Stupid, maybe. Oh well. I've also been cleaning, and finally got around to working on The Catcher in the Rye.

2010-12-26T15:51:00.000-05:00

I will not rant. But since I feel excessively crappy today, I won't even post for fear of it turning into a rant-post. Here, have a pretty song-thing.

Merry (or Happy, Christopher over there :p ) Christmas!

2010-12-25T00:48:00.000-05:00

The tree is absolutely surrounded. Ali noted that whenever our family is together, it always feels like we have an absolute kjbfkjdshiuhgiew (for lack of better phrasing) of presents. I, actually, am stiiiiill working on an art project for Alenya and Kaitlyn which has me swearing at Cinderella and demanding that she do horrible perverse to me, despite that the appendage I say she pleasure when yelling at her is one I lack. Nonetheless, Cinderella. You're a saucy, pitiless, manipulative, undesirable, gossipy, pink, turbulent, tangled, virtue-less, cold-hearted, feeble, transparent, sugary, isolated, thick, pointless, papery, I'm-simply-using-unrelated-adjectives-now strumpet. I hate you. Suck it. Belle for the win.

So, we've been in Maryland for the last day... it's crazy, as always. Kiki, Ali's family's bulldog puppy that they got for KK's birthday, tried to eat off my nose... And Mom, shockingly, is much more fond of her than she is of Addy, the cat. And plus we have the girls. They've been fairly well-behaved as long as we've been here (must be 'cause of Santa.), if loud. But nobody can deny where they get it from. However, even KK's been decent. She'll cuddle with me, amazingly.

Anyhoozles. Yesterday we went to this Mexican restaurant for supper, and a waiter there looked like Avery, a very amusing friend of Cassie's who just so happens to be absolutely adorable. Avery's cuter than the waiter-guy, though. I mentioned this several times over supper. And for some reason, they do this in the Baltimore area but not where I live, they serve children this dough to play with before the meal comes. So Alenya and I shared some and I made myself a beard, so I could stroke it and appear to be a wise (if incessantly loud and obnoxious) old sage in contemplation. However, Mom kept dipping an extra straw in salsa and poking holes in my goatee. You can imagine my dismay. So, in hopes of discouraging her, I exclaimed, "Nooooooo, Mom! Ke$ha likes my beard! D:" This, however, did not deter her, and only amused my sister. I did become a trendsetter, though, as Ali also made herself a beard (and mustache!), and Alenya also had one at some point. Then she attempted to make glasses and point her fingers, saying "Helloooooo ladies!" Wanna know what that made me think of?

He-lloooo Nurse!

You better know where that's from, man. Or else I... I'll.... be powerless to do anything.

Today (which is now yesterday), some of the neighborhood kids came over. I believe they range from ages two to ten, but they were fun to play with. Savannah, the oldest, thinks I'm really weird because I break out into the macarena at random intervals, totally love playing hide and seek and become stuck between the wall and washing machine doing such, refuse to use the proper variation of "cheater cheater pumpkin eater!" (Andrea: "Cheater cheater... Pants doused in kerosene!" ), pretend to be Kaitlyn, etc. Then after they left, we went to K-mart to pick some things up, and I called Simon on Ali's iPhone on the way there, commencing a very serious discussion about forking and its repercussions, my father's sexuality (and how Ali and I have no mother, as our father is a fungus and therefore reproduces asexually), Simon's secret love affairs with oh, EVERYBODY, mouse pads and how men are so dang hard to Christmas shop for. Feedback please, male readers. Do any of you even CARE what you get? Can you at least give us some sort of idea? Pleeeeeease?

It's been chaos, but I've learned to expect it. And ohhhhh, later! Can't wait! Especially can't wait until I get this freakin' colourin' DONE! Merry/happy/feliz Christmas, dudes. And womandudes. Enjoy it! <3.

Things I didn't talk about ('Cause I suck).

2010-12-22T15:47:00.001-05:00

Soooo, in chronological order, this oughta go Homecoming, Date-stuff (I really have to talk about all this? What is there to say..?), aaaaand I dunno.

Homecoming. I thought it was going to be a totally typical thing. I was wrong, so awesomely wrong. 'Course, I was going with Misty and Simon, things are not going to be typical, they're going to be like someone's on crack. I'm not quite sure how to describe it. High-heel related pain (which is odd, because usually, I do perfectly fine with heels), Misty lying on the gym floor, slow dance orgy (Me: "We have five people in this slow dance circle! IS IT CONSIDERED AN ORGY YET!?" But nobody answered me...), all sorts of Fox-gropage, a bromance (this is how it works: Lauren; chaperon, Fox and Simon; couple, Andrea; homewrecker to the Fox/Simon bromance; Misty: third/fourth/gaaaaah don't even know wheel.), and to quote Lauren: "Y'know you too, the magazine room is unlocked." No, we never found out. We're not sure how Lauren knew, either. And when I got home Lauren had messaged me asking if babies were made. Thanks. Lots of faith in me, you have.

Two days later, Simon asked me out. The rest of the world thought it'd taken long-freakin'-enough. ("Soooo I know you'd never like me, but umm.. Would you like to go out?" Wtf is with that first part? DID I ASK YOU TO HOMECOMING FOR NOTHING? *facepalm.*)

For a while there, Fox, Simon's best friend was dating Lauren (hence why she was at Homecoming with us), and they planned several double dates which Simon and I got dragged along on. Like, trip to the movies where a creepy, supposedly Iranian man ~~who may very well have been April in a disguise~~ as staring at Simon and I and Lauren attempted to do the macarena to distract him. Somehow, it didn't work. How can you NOT join in, let alone pay attention, to someone doing the macarena!? And that movie sucked. Jussayin'. :< Oh, and Simon and I also found out we had like forty kids. Stiiiiiiill not sure how that happened. But we're sending them to take over Russia, just so we can make fun of Napoleon.

I forgot to mention this, but after the Saturday performance of Mulan, my cousins (who are my parents' age so I get confused and call them aunt and uncle sometimes) and my sister were in to see it, and she decided Simon had to come, too, as she wanted to meet him. So Ali and picked him up, along with her best friend, Amanda, a couple hours before we had to leave. So we had like this massive gathering at my house (shush. Ten people, to me, is massive.), which resulted in Alenya and KK harassing Simon to no end and Ali and Simon having a fork war (Simon [to Ali]: "I prefer spooning..." Andrea: O-O... Ali: *busts a gut.*), among other oddities. I think I can say Simon and Ali are far too alike for me not to be scared.

After the play, we decided we wanted to go cause havoc in Wal*Mart. Ali attempted to register Simon and I for a wedding gift registry... Thingie, the floors were really slidey so when we played hide-and-go-seek I kept falling all over the place, Simon was trying bras on aaaaaaand etc... Geeze. You people.

So, that's most of what went on for a while. Some notes from in-between are that I can actually SOMEWHAT write poetry when I am incredibly determined (thank you Mrs. Jenkins!), I subconsciously have a grudge against Macy because I always beat her up/kill her off/etc whenever we do things in theatre, everyone in Pre-Honors English is INSANE, Christmas shopping (why is there no bookstore in the mall? Dude. Bookstores should be mandatory by law.), aaaaaand I'll try and remember anything else. Oh, and Fox and Lauren broke up, resulting in massive amounts of CHAOS! and DESTRUCTION! and LAUREN BEING ALL... GWAAARGH! and FOX BEING REALLY EMO! and ASKING OUT LAUREN'S BEST FRIEND! Which is where I kinda lost pity for him... But then he ended up asking out Nicole, yes, the one we've all come to know and love and they've been dating for a couple days. ~~Simon and I totally predicted this, too.~~

Finally, last Friday, I went with madrigal choir on a trip to the Benedum in Pittsburgh to perform before and during intermission of The Nutcracker, which was an awesome experience. Just... Entirely awesome. Even if I wanted to just pass out in my heavy madrigal dress (which FINALLY fit properly!). I discussed the ballet afterward with one of my friends. Thanks to taking Stagecraft and doing tech work, she spent the entire thing trying to figure out the lighting clues, how they did it all. I, on the other hand, was completely awed by all the costuming. If I did anything with costumes/props/scenery, I'd likely end up in costume design. All the beautiful costume candy was so much to me. I couldn't help but wonder how much painstaking effort was put into so many gorgeous gorgeous GORGEOUS costumes. It's so expensive a ballet to get into, I'm so glad I got to go with my choir.

The bus ride to and from was insane, though. Like, twenty or so crazy madrigal kids (plus a clarinet quartet), most of who have had sugar or are naturally hyperactive. I sat with Amber (we had the amazing Asian seat!), who, on the way home, said: "Someone get me some duct tape. And not the colourful type, she'll find some way to entertain herself with it!"

Didn't help that I had a parfait when we stopped at McDonald's to eat. There was an arcade there but the DDR wouldn't work... So sad... Plus Amber had to go up and talk to the clerk-guy 'cause she didn't get a toy with her Happy Meal and she was not pleased. :p Then she gave me her apple dippers. HECK YEAH APPLES.

... And I think this should conclude my ketchup post. I have learned my lesson, and never again do I want to hiatus. D:

Theatre Kids.

2010-12-22T13:02:00.000-05:00

Per request of Maddy, I dug up a post I started at the end of Mulan, and didn't finish for various reasons. And some other stuff will be published next post. 'Cause this takes quite a bit of space.

Thus marks the end of Mulan and the beginning of a period where there are no productions or auditions. I guess I still have madrigal choir shtuff to do, though, so it's not too horribly bad. Now, if I can use this time to reclaim my rightful place in the hierarchy of English class and not fail Geometry simply to spite it in all its atrocious straight lines.

The last two days have been the absolute greatest. Friday was the day of our second performance, but after opening night, the two classes in the theatre first period (musical theatre I and stagecraft) were sorted out into three groups and given the assignment to make a parody of Mulan. They were all hilarious. One group stuck to the plot, but their Mulan was a boy and it was sort of a parody of events (with a Yu-Gi-Oh reference in regards to the avalanche! I was amused.). It also included a mash-up of the opening song of the play and Ke$ha's TiK ToK.

Then you had my group.. Our Mulan was originally a shelf-stacker... I impersonated five different ancestors and was apparently insane, sobbing over Mulan's inability to differentiate between tortillas and pizza pies. She tells her father and attempts to sing Reflection, only to be interrupted by grumpy sleepy father figure. Then her father was called to RECONSTRUCT THE PRESIDENT'S BATHROOM! Cue Mulan's theft of the job and more ancestor breakdowns. Turns out, the hammer she steals (yeah... Instead of armor) TALKS. And sounds like a black revivalist preacher! Then comes in the jealous construction worker who MUST be the absolute best. Then they have an epic battle in the president's bathroom, with the talking hammer instructing Mulan and somehow, she kills the-unnamed-jealous-construction-worker by throwing a pile of snow that was randomly there! By this time, the ancestor(s) is/are so confused that they're in fetal position crying to THEIR ancestors to help them. The president gives Mulan the award of the Golden Plunger, and she returns to her father.

And he did not want a hug.

The next group, and the last, decided that Fa Zhou was a former woman impersonator who was offered his old job back, and Mulan took his place. So she was a girl pretending to be a man pretending to be a woman. And her trainer in such, Latisha, was soooo cute and funny. Latisha's super-little, too. Makes me wanna squee.

The performances, I failed because I apparently seemed sort of traumatized when my family was there. I totally failed. I was told I did fine on Friday, the second out of three performances, totally let loose, and that was actually the night with the biggest crowd. I think that actually helped, because I couldn't find anybody I knew anywhere (save for Ben, Seth's older brother. I had to go through the crowd in his aisle and told him he was dead, he wasn't allowed to be alive).

My family was confused as to why I wasn't Mulan. Really, it didn't bother me any that I wasn't, I'm not as good a singer as Anne, anyway. No solos for me, hahah. No lungs of steel.

And like... I can't go onto this much longer. Next post or couple is going to be all catching up. Lovely.

HENCE WHY YOU DO NOT GO ON HIATUS, PEOPLE. D:

Omfg.

2010-12-06T09:08:00.000-05:00

May very well be the only acronym to describe my absence.

WORLD, STOP DISTRACTING ME.

So, things that've been missed:

Homecoming

Mulan
Several... Errr... Uhh... Yeah dates.

Fall Fine Arts Festival

Life in general.

Man I suck. I wonder if I should tell you about them even though it's been months... And truth is, I'm only here right now 'cause it's a snow day! Woot woot! ... Must. Try harder. To not have a life.

AHHHHHHH comes crashing in.

2010-11-14T18:15:00.000-05:00

It's been lifetimes, hasn't it? How ya been?

So a bunch of stuff happened that you probably don't care to hear about over the time lapse... I've been caught up in coincidences, Mulan, madrigal and the Geometry I can never stop ranting about. I'm not sure what to tell you all, since any specific event seems so much less significant when blogged about so much later. So, we've missed Homecoming, some more stuff, a date or two, a lot of rehearsal antics, aaaaaaaand more of my sometimes-entertaining-but-normally-exceedingly-bland life.

Hopefully I'll be able to catch up. You guys should persecute me for neglecting my bloggy child.

P.S.--Speakin' of kids, I supposedly have over thirty right now. Guess who's bein' castrated. =_=

Stomaches don't have adult insects in them.

2010-10-16T12:07:00.000-04:00

So, after spending the majority of last night trying to tell April I had a "squeezie" on her (thank you, Christopher) and reading Hanna is not a Boy's Name, I am still kind of tired and need to print out that hairstyle so I can show Joanie what I want done. And hopefully it'll work out. As my hair is nigh uncontrollable unless the supreme force of a Chi iron is involved, I dunno. I hope it'll work out. The dress is all planned out, though.

I hope it all goes well and rather unplanned.

...

2010-10-14T17:30:00.000-04:00

So I should let y'all know, I think the PSAT went absolutely dandy, on the English section, anyway. Math, not so much, but I did decently (which IS NOT GOOD ENOUGH). Oh, and I tried replying to y'all's comments, but Blogger isn't a cooperative being when it comes to commenting on my own blog. Hah. Maybe it's a sign.

This week at school's been spirit week. It hasn't been too eventful, save for my kimono-robe on Monday's Pajama Day ("Are you wearing anything under that?" and makeshift strapless bras), and yesterday, Hippie/Eighties day. Now I'm uncertain that most people in the eighties didn't dress that outrageously, but heck, I'm not letting that ruin my fun! Problem is, if I try to look "eighties"-ish, I just look like myself on a normal day. Phail.

Tomorrow's Black and Silver day (school colours, considering we are the "Knights" after all), then Saturday is Homecoming. I'm going with Simon, and this arrangement has been settled for weeks and I just haven't told you. Sorr-eeeeeeee. I'm kind of scared about the whole thing, since I don't usually bother with social events, but I think it'll be okay.

I wish the world would slow down for just a moment or two.

A "STOP THE WORLD" Moment.

2010-10-12T21:36:00.000-04:00

I have the three hour long PSAT (Preliminary SAT, I think? P-somethin' SAT), a Geometry (so clearly my least favorite subject) test, am missing my two wake-up-and-be-creative classes due to aforementioned PSAT test. Plus I am being Facebook-stalked by a superclingy guy and al other sorts of lovely things. I EVEN GOT YELLED AT FOR HUGGING PEOPLE YESTERDAY. Resulting in a random quarrel today in English that gave Alyssa the totally wrong idea.

Soooo, I can hold people's hands, very explicitly sending off the message that we are involved, which is the wrong idea which too many people have, but I cannot give someone a mere hug, which can be a PERFECTLY PLATONIC gesture of affection, and not awkward at all ~~Ali~~. I call nonsense!

Hopefully I'm not so grumpy tomorrow. Maybe I can draw more creeper pictures of people.

Uwaaa.

2010-10-11T19:07:00.000-04:00

I have twenty-four questions to be answering. And I get the feeling more will come here soon. So, let's go!

The rules are simple. Answer the eight questions, add eight of your own for others to answer, then tag the eight people who have to answer them. (What's with this person's obsession with "eight"?) I've been tagged ~~twice~~ tree times now, so I have three sets of eight to finish. Fun. -___-

Firstly, Mack-Attack's questions.

1. What is the most random thing you've ever said?

I have said so much random junk over my fourteen years that I honestly do not know. I can take entire paragraphs and make them random, and yet, tie together in a way that very very few people would understand.

2. Has anything embarrassing happened to you at school, and what?

My fourth and fifth grade years of elementary were pretty much two years of an embarrassment, both then and now, reminiscing. And it all started when I hit puberty... Ugh. I don't wanna talk about it.

3. What is the most random song lyric you can think of?

"Puppy dogs and sugar frogs, and kittens baby teeth

Watch out all you mothers, I'm happy as hardcore

Happy as a coupon for a 20 dollar whore!" <--I am prone to singing this, but the last line right here is the only part I ever remember.

4. Do you like nachos?

Mmmm, yummy.

5. Who is your favorite celebrity?

Uhhh...

6. Do you LOVE SpongeBob???

He's mildly entertaining, but doesn't hold my attention long enough for us to be lovers.

7. Did you know that most of these questions are pointless, and are just wasting your time?

There could be worse things. I'm kind of glad I have this to waste my time with, honestly.

8. Did you know that this is the last question? Because it is :D

Not for me it isn't!

Now, for Maddy-Moo's! <3.

1: Would you call yourself a geek?

I consider myself pretty darn geeky, yeah. I'm not much compared to a lot of my friends, but still geeky.

2: Where do you like to hang out?

Iiiiiiii don't get out much, to be honest. And even if I did, there aren't many places to go in rural WV, unless I wanna risk being eaten by a bear. Or rednecks. :p

3: If you could have ANYTHING for a pet, what would it be? (Mine would be a unicorn! :D)

~~Man-slave.~~ I've wanted a salamander as of recent, I don't know why, it was just a whim. OH WAIT, mythological/fantasy animals, too! I would want a kitsune/nine-tailed fox. No, I have not been watching Naruto or playing PokÈmon lately. Why do you ask..?

4: If you could only eat one kind of food for the rest of your life, what would it be?

The food kind. Heheh I'm not clever at all... Okay. Probably lumpia. Even though it's fried and will make me fat when my eating habits finally come back to haunt me.

5: Do you wanna help me blow stuff up?

OF COURSE.

6: Rock, paper, or scissors?

Lizard.

7: If you could meet any celebrity, who would it be?

I'm not even sure I care.

8: What kind of clothes do you wear?

I wear the sort of clothes that most people only wear when emulating sluts, goths, or fairies on Halloween.

And now for Christopher's!

1) Favorite John Hughes movie?

The Breakfast Club is the only one I think I've ever seen. I loved it, though.
2) Most shameful celebrity crush?

Johnny Depp. Yeah. Really.

3) Quick! If you were directing your first music video for a slow, tragic alternative-rock song, what would the basic plot and setting be?

Ohhhh, tragedy? Really? I wanna relate it to artistic unappreciation, base it somewhere in a city, aaaaaand make it feel like it was a produced on acid.

4) What's your dream place to live?
I don't really have one. West Virginia, at least this county, is sooo gorgeous, but I need out, but I have no idea where to go.

5) If you were stuck on a desert island with nothing but your friend and an Introduction to Calculus textbook, how long would you wait before you ate your friend?
Depends. How big is the textbook, and how hungry is my friend? I might be eaten first, knowing them..

6) If you could meet anyone from history, from religious icon to child star from 80's sitcom, who would it be and why?
I certainly would like to meet Hitler. I believe he'd have to been quite the character to influence so many people in such odd ways.

7) What invention do you wish you were credited with?

I'd say the interwebs, but I'm not sure it's done more good than harm.

8) Now I'll have to go with a classic one: if you could have any superpower except super-strength and X-ray vision, which would it be and why?

~~Invisibility, 'cause I'm a staaaaaalker.~~ Probably the ability to conjure up real things from drawings. I think it oughta be a super power, it'd most certainly be useful.

Now, for my eight questions. Haruuuuuuum.

1. Does having to play these Blogger games make you wanna punch someone in the face 'cause it postpones posting about your ever-so-melodramatic life?

2. What are your feelings on zombies?

3. If you could visit any time period ever, what would it be, and who would you take with you (this person has to be real, and someone you actually know)?

4. If I gave you Scotch tape, a sharpie, and some studded gloves, what would you do with 'em?

5. Are you suspicious or sympathetic towards third wheels?

6. Pretend you have a sandbox. But it's not filled with sand. Instead, what is it filled with?

7. Do you prefer stupid nonsensical questions, or deep metaphorical ones which make you ponder life, God, and the universe around us itself?

8. Tell me what your regular disposition on life is.

Phew! Now that that's over with, I hereby curse...

The Chin Scratcher

TEEN INVASION

Unicorn Pencil

And this is all totally optional since you guys have already done yours. But for the rest of you...

~With Love and Kisses~

Sporks are Useless

Imperfection in all its Entirety

A Little Bit of Randomness

all things left unsaid

Life is Hard

I tagged nine. Yay me.

NOW BACK TO YOUR REGULAR POSTING SCHEDULE, DARNIT.

Oh by the way, I revived my extremely emo tumblr. Should I link it, or should I spare you the angst and amusing pictures?

I got Three ( D: ) Question-Tag-Games to Finish, but Right now I just can't seem to Care.

2010-10-05T18:55:00.000-04:00

The second part of Mulan auditions were today, aaaand I actually didn't entirely fail dancing.

It was all going great until I had a very lonesome bus ride home, prompting me to actually think about everything I'm doing, and how most things don't turn out too well in the end.

And now I'm too disheartened to write a proper blog post.

It's not Every day you wrap the Former Principal in Saran Wrap...

2010-09-27T19:11:00.001-04:00

Title says a lot, doesn't it?

Today in Musical Theatre, the former principal of our high school (who had assisted in several plays) came in today, in need of our Stagecraft class's assistance (and MT joined in, since we're almost a joint class). He needed a mold to send to a wig-maker, because he is doing reenactments (as Stonewall Jackson!) around the state, and needed a black wig (for both his head and beard) so he wouldn't have to go through the process of dyeing it. So first we had to mark his hairline with a blue pen, as his hair is white so the hairline is indistinguishable after all the taping up. Then, we wrapped his head (from the eyes up) in Saran Wrap, so the tape wouldn't stick to his hair (owwieeeee), then we TAPED ALL AROUND IT. MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Ironic how Misty and I had been talking about my affections for tape ~~and desire to stick certain people to the wall with it to see if they would survive overnight~~ earlier on the bus.

Then I had to re-draw the hairline onto the tape, along with ear outlines, then we had to take head measurements. That was the end of my section, and pretty much the end of the head section. THEN THERE WAS THE BEARD. Which first period only did part of, the rest of that was left to second. But poor Zach went up for this one, and he seemed absolutely horrified.

Quote for the day: "DON'T MOVE, I DON'T WANNA KILL YOU."

However, Seth (back to the tall new one, he's been gone a few posts, hasn't he?), who is a cross between hyperactive adorable and completely zoned out, was quiet and expressionless. Misty thought there should have been ominous music in the background while he was working (then again, Zach had the scissors while Seth did not. Thank goodness.).

And that was the highlight of my day.

Ohbtw, Simon's preggers. I shall now leave you to ponder how that could be.

Of Dismal Movies.

2010-09-22T17:36:00.001-04:00

Knowing, with Nicolas Cage, is a terribly depressing movie. I don't want to spoil it in case you were going to watch it, but I have never watched something so depressing in my life. I heard there are worse movies, But I never want to watch them. Ever. Evereverever. One, I can go with never again seeing a realistic, graphic plane crash, and really, the ending contributed zero. I mean, no matter what he did, humanity was screwed. And there's a hole. If humanity went all splodey, how could Caleb be writing down the next set of catastrophes? Speaking of little Caleb, he reminds me of a classmate of mine from Links, Jacob. And when he gets serious and insightful, he reminds me of Seth. Who, by the way, I called yesterday, and he's growing up on me!! His voice is deepening out (if cracking a little), and when I asked, he said he is "most definitely" taller than me now. I see him next week for Mulan auditions, so we'll see! I will probably end up close to tears, I feel like a mother, watching him grow up... So proud.

*manly tears.*

Anyway, disregard that little tangent, please. It was really weird to see little Jacob/Seth predicting the end of the Earth. Like... I have this urge to protect them now and cry and ask them when I'm going to die.

Renaissance Festival. Obvious Title is Obvious.

2010-09-20T22:00:00.000-04:00

Sunday, I went to a Renaissance festival with my cousin, her husband, friend, and children. And it was awesome. I really hope they'll have it next year, because I want to be able to go for it for more than an hour or two next year, and actually have money to do things (note to self: start bringing money on vacay, no matter what you think you'll be doing.). It was eye heaven, seeing all the events and knights and maids and and pirates and fairies (which I DID NOT expect) and wenches... I wanted to squeal soooo badly at them all, the outfits were GORGEOUS. I now also regret not bringing my camera. Not to mention to events. The jousting, the comedy, games... Ohhhhhh, it was all so neat!!

Any of you all ever been to one?

Titletitletitle.

2010-09-16T19:09:00.001-04:00

I didn't visit Simon this morning like I usually do, and by lunch I was wondering if he'd died since I hadn't seen him (even though I usually only do in the concourse and fourth period), and when I did get to fourth period, HE WAS ABSENT. If my wild guesses were right for once and he'd really died (which would be the second time I developed this theory), I would not be happeh. 'Course, I was trying to avoid him, but only in the MORNING. Isn't this just great.

Today, Alex-who-I-have-barely-talked-to-since-fifth-grade demonstrated how licking a gum wrapper and sticking it to your forehead BURNS. Sticking the gum itself to your forehead also burns, and is rather cold. I, being dumb, want to try and see if they were being honest or just melodramatic, as they often are.

Misty is trying to talk me into attending Homecoming. We've been friends for a couple years now, and she's a Senior, and so the only events we'll both really be able to go to are Homecoming and Prom, and she says she's dragging me to one or the other. I feel bad for not wanting to go, but I end up miserable at big social things. Running around in pretty dresses with my friends is awesome. Being crowded at a big social high school thing seeing girls hanging all over their boyfriends making me 97% disgusted, is not. So I'm still in the process of making up my mind. While Misty devises evil plans. ~~Simon, run for your life. Or you will experience K.O. by massive anime boobies, courtest of Misty.~~

I Forgot Alex's Witty Quote.

2010-09-14T18:05:00.000-04:00

He says so many title-worthy things, but I can't seem to remember them. It depresses me so. I have homework tonight, and I had planned to do it whenever I arrived home, but, lo and behold, I am once again on the interwebs. I'm a lost cause, aren't I.

So Geometry is making me suicidal (and then I found out that Science Honors is WORSE), and I have a Journal Entry where I can choose my prompt. So now my English teacher gets to know all about the emotional teaspoon that is moi. Along with anybody who'd be desperate enough to steal my journal, although I don't think I have any stalkers who would do that.

Nobody wants to now about the crazy shoelace girl who falls out of her desk for no apparent reason. I see how it is...

Break it, why don't You..

2010-09-11T21:02:00.001-04:00

Before this post begins, I want to please ask you to think of the victims of 9/11/2001. I was only a Kindergartner when those planes crashed into the Twin Towers, so I don't remember much, but to think of it now, especially how people jumped from that building to escape burning to death, like it'd matter how they died, is about as shocking as anything. September tenth, that year, we were a different country from who we are now. Please, let us have changed for the better.

Today, I was in Kingwood for the Order of the Rhododendron ceremony, which, if I haven't already said, honors the top ten-or-so scoring students on the Golden Horseshoe test in the county. Yeah, sounds miserable, right? Formalities and blahblahblah and such.

Complete. Opposite.

Please. Ali, David, and Simon were there (among others who I didn't spend much time with). Nothing good can come of this, right? Well... Considering the actual ceremony started at about 11:15, and we were all there at least an hour early, we got to wander around exploring. Well, guess what happens when we're told to make ourselves at home? We will.

So, for the next hour, Simon, David (if previously unmentioned, Nicole's ex-boyfriend who I am friends with, who is part of the Color Guard), Ali, some JROTC guy who David referred to as "Baker" and I explored the second floor of the house (where, yes, we were allowed. Don't gimme that look.). David and Baker didn't come along until I was trying to trap Simon in a closet, though. ~~Geeze, we're horrible.~~ But then... We found the attic (dundundun!). But no lightswitch, so five of us were walking up some realllllly really narrow stairs and it was one of those typical in-the-dark scenes ("Simon, get your butt out of my face!!"), and the boys were using their cell phones as lights, and when we got to the top of the stairs, we realized two things: One) the ceiling was REALLY LOW, and two) it had nails sticking out of it. That last detail was enough for us, who could only see that much, to freak out and go back down the stairs.

Then it turned out the lightswitch was right by the stairs' entrance. Wow, we really are geniuses. We went to go explore some more around, and some of the discoveries we made were (in no specific order):

One of the rooms had veterinary tools, and I'm not sure why. I just know the first time I'd went in that room before everybody else arrived, I was terrified. And I wasn't the only one. For Ali, it was the cow fetus extraction tool. For Simon and David, it was the castration device... Another had historical furniture, which I must say, was increeeeeeedibly pretty. We weren't allowed very far into there, and for good reason, considering several of us are total klutzes.
Another room, on the first floor, had newspaper clippings of various important events and places in the county. My hometown never showed up, sadly. I was about ready to bust some butt over that. Show us some love!
The bathroom has no lock (and is a very unfitting shade of pink), and neither do most of the closets (hence why my repeated attempts to lock Simon in the closets [and the bathroom] ended in failure. He's too big and can push out of them). The one that does, the lock does not reach the doorframe. What the heck is up with that?
David and Baker actually came up during one of my attempts to lock Simon in a closet. They walked into the room where Ali was watching me struggle and I just had my back against the door trying to keep it closed. David and Baker just gave me suspicious looks while I tried to explain my innocence. Then Simon knocked and... Well... Yeah.
There is a corridor full of storage rooms, and we explored each one pretty thoroughly. Two of the more interesting groups of items would have to be the golf clubs (why?), and Winter decorative deer. The latter of which Simon tried to ride. He ended up breaking it, we think. But shhhh, nobody has to know.
There were these big trunk-case-things that Simon and I found before Ali arrived. We were hoping for something particularly shocking, but instead.. We found pictures. Really big, fairly old pictures. We had some trouble trying to put them back after dislodging them. And then re-locking the trunk. We hope nobody checks for fingerprints or anything.
I can fit into most closet shelves. My GOODNESS, that place had a lot of closets. And if I go into the fetal position, I can fit into some of the smallest. We were planning to put me in one and jump out to surprise the next person who opened it, but considering my skirt, that might not have been a good idea.
We found a staircase right below the attic, leading to a door. We later found out that the door opened into the dining room, but ~~Simon~~ we didn't particularly want to get in trouble (just in case!), so we didn't open it (we found out its location by looking for it when we went back downstairs). However, I was determined, and being second in line, tried to trap Simon so that he had to open it, but he just picked me up and went back upstairs. This was the first of several times he ended up carrying me, for different reasons.
When we finally dared venture back up into the attic (turning on the lightswitch this time), we discovered that the entire ceiling was nail-laden (but it wasn't too horribly bad), and Ali, David, and Baker went further on (I didn't think I'd make it without falling, thank you gigantic boots I insisted on wearing) ahead, I think the only things back there were building materials. And probably a lot more nails.
And this was all accomplished within about an hour, yes.

Among other things... And, in non-building related events, apparently my tendency to give way too many hugs is funny, Simon's mom has the same name as me, awkwardly, and little!Simon's (yes there are two. And they have rather similar personalities. But little!Simon's real name is Gregory, of all things.) dad nicknamed me "Boots", 'cause of my gigantic ones, which is the first thing he noticed about me, but he did also mention he liked them, sooo.... I guess I wasn't too entirely improper by wearing them.

... I think I've rambled enough. In short, my day was one of my best ever. ~~'Cause trust me, I didn't tell you everything. Most, but not everything. Don't worry, what's gone isn't to be worried about.~~ I want to go back sometime and learn more about why what is where, because that was a very interesting historical house.

Five Sentences.

2010-09-10T20:00:00.001-04:00

So, I found out today that writing five sentences a day will improve one's writing ability. Now that's probably painfully obvious, but I never really thought about it. I guess I have had that mindset, though, since I've written because I wished to be an amazing writer. Can't say I've achieved that status (yet), but I swear, some day. I will be there. And there will be hugs and immense joy from that day forth (this is sentence number five).

By the way, I've been noticing an interesting trend in methods of describing me.

Caleb: "You have the coordination of a dead cat."

Zach: "So you know how you have the attention span of a dying squirrel? MINE IS WORSE."

Me: "I sound like a dying cow today... Ugh...."

Back to Square One.

2010-09-09T19:44:00.000-04:00

Lauren says I'm the one who needs a therapist, not her. Lovely, right? I can't help it I'm apparently an oxymoron. I don't exactly see how being a cute and cuddly ball of ANGST is being an oxymoron, but I don't see a lot of things. I'm resident ditz for a reason...

So, my throat is in a rapid state of decline, possibly due to the weather. And according to Brigette, a Senior in madrigal choir (she's Lebaneeeese! And before last night, I didn't even know where Lebanon was.), said eighty people went home sick yesterday, and that sort of worries me. And I'm trying to miss as few days as possible, as I with all my heart do not want to take finals at the semester's end.

I've been all sorts of stressed over stupid things lately. I'm a scatterbrain, so I feel like I've always forgotten something, I fear nobody really likes me (it's like sixth grade all over again. And that's the year I miss right now, oddly enough. It was the one year I managed to go without any crushes because all the guys I knew, I'd known for what felt like forever and they all sucked [and honestly, still do]), I fear I'm not doing good enough in my classes, yadda yadda yadda... Typical things, really. I feel so average. Maybe I should just accept that I am average, or something. It's been a fairly long time since I felt--okay lie. But it was a special based on false hope.

Right now I'm just freaked that Zachary and Simon'll end up... Yeah no bueno. I don't need the latter with a mechanical pencil jabbed into his esophagus 'cause he doesn't know (or he does, and just doesn't care) when to quit. ~~It kind of sucks having missed everybody's history, being from a different school, 'cause I sense that's not all current tension with those two. But when was my intuition ever of any use.~~ I'm not choosing, but this... I just hope it's quick. Or something. I am really really honestly desperately hoping and I'm not even totally sure why.

I'm a mess when I'm Alone.

2010-09-08T18:46:00.000-04:00

"Sept. 5 - 11 is National Suicide Prevention Week. Suicide is the third most common cause of death for 18 - 24 year olds. On WEDNESDAY, September 8th, write (or paint, color, draw) the word "LOVE" on your wrist as a form of recognition.

Create a beautiful canvas out of that which might seem another's last resort."

There's an intentional reason why it's smudgy and nearly illegible, yes.

Life is stressful, and if I don't attend to it right this instant, it will result in me once again falling asleep while doing homework, and in my hysteria-induced sleep, life will slither up to me and eat me alive, and the only way to escape its stomach ain't pretty. Plus I want to have time to call Zach, to see how rehearsal went (oh yeah, I didn't tell you guys. I didn't make it into Velveteen Rabbit. But it's all good, I can't wait to watch my friends in it.) and watch some anime.

Unwind.

'Else I'll break.

I can't help Myself, Darnit.

2010-09-01T19:44:00.000-04:00

So I am procrastinating on my homework. Lovely. It feels like it's been years since I've had any, and considering so little I had in junior high, that makes sense. Plus... I do not like geometry. It just frazzles me, with all its.... Oh, I don't even know. One of the 2010 graduates told Chelsea (a friend and classmate from madrigal choir) and I to "Approach it like music. It's like a language all its own. Think of numbers like notes and tackle it a little at a time." So I will most definitely try out that advice tonight.

In the meantime, I met some more new people (*le gasp!* Is this really Andrea who is talking?! IT'S NOT POSSIBLEEEE.). One of them is shorter than me. And my mother. And speaking of my mom, Ali and I found out she is legally a midget, shorter than we thought. ~~Oh snap, please hold, I forgot to get the pizza out of the oven.~~ Then there's another, whoooo.... Left a very impressive first impression on me. Although it wasn't exactly a first impression, considering I'd seen him before. But you get the point. Soooo, what was this first impression?

Two days ago, Tasha (someone else I met, reaaaaaally nice girl, I think) had me toss her a studded fingerless glove I was wearing, and when she tossed it back, as I was putting it back on, Simon, the guy two seats in front of me said "Those look like dominatrix gloves," and as I was trying to stutter out how I was actually very meek he continued on, "I'll give you five dollars if you tell me to 'bend over, big boy', spank me, and pull out your whip."

I get the feeling that would offend some people... But I find it pretty hilarious, 'cause dominatrices have been a topic of some pretty interesting conversation before, far as I'm concerned. Like my ability to be one has been debated before. Interesting how someone might bring that up the first time they meet me. Weiiiiird.

I also realized this afternoon that this might be the reason he did not refuse my request for a piggyback ride down the stairs (which we are both surprised we didn't fall down) yesterday, coming back from pictures (I am still slightly annoyed at how early the date for it was. I will look nothing like my ID card by the end of the year. Possibly. ... Okay no, I'll look exactly like it.). And I wonder if I should even describe my journey with everybody to and from pictures. There was a ninja, I jumped on Simon too many times to be inconspicuous, Dustin (aforementioned short one's) theories... creepy old man, Cody not knowing at all what was goin' on.. Yeah. Interesting.

I think there's not too much more I need in life, for now.

2010-08-28T19:07:00.000-04:00

I want to write something pretty and meaningful, but the only things that come to mind probably aren't very original.This depresses me, and I want nothing less than to go back to angsting right now.

It's probably rude to be on the computer (and hard to write) with people here, anyway.

I love high School Drama. I Honestly do. Says a lot About my Sense of Humor, Doesn't It?

2010-08-28T01:53:00.000-04:00

Brief summary: Ohhh, so... So-and-so is dating this guy and Whitney talked to said guy (Mark something? I think he's in my Links.) and OMG IT'S WAAAAAAAAAAR in high pitched voices! Plus I look like a prostitute but can't act like one to save my life (considering as far as anybody in Geometry knows, I have no real voice and talk to a grand total of... Okay, Nikki.), Seth/Sarah something I don't wish to know enough to talk about because it completely kicks all logic out the window, down the street, and into a rapist-alley; Aaron's girlfriend broke up with him and now he's a big bag of cow manure-esque attitude and emo, aaaaaand the world all wants to beat Caleb up, for some reason. I don't believe "being a blue-haired faggot", which is the only reason I've received so far, is reasonable, but since when is reason to be expected of these people, eh?

When I think about those things and just how big a deal people can make over them (myself included, can't be a hypocrite now can we...), it's honestly pretty funny. If pathetic.

Now while I feel accomplished, I am playing around on Facebook, and realize that most of the people who came over from East with me have met many more people than I have, somehow, and all their friends seem to be very noticeable.

Maybe I'm destined to be a wallflower no matter what I do. Which isn't so bad, it makes life easier, even though I wonder how everybody meets all these people. I mean, I met so few people of interest in my classes... Or maybe I'm just stuck-up... Or shy...

Well, least I'm not like Whitney, managing to annoy random gossipy chicks who decide "if you talk to my boyfriend at all then you must be seducing him (which is 100% your fault because we must remember, men do not have this thing called "resistance" and we cannot fault them for this because.... Andrea doesn't know.) and you shall socially dieeeeeeeeee for it!!". But then again, I hear from Nicole this was the same group who decided I was a freak of the shun-able type for the way I dress ~~and perhaps I am.~~ Like I don't expect it. *sigh.* I can't believe I actually paid any mind to it, though. Just stop watching me with your looks of disapproval, please and thank you. I'm sorry I can pull off big boots (by the way, first time ever a guy told me they didn't look like "hooker boots" the other day. More "you look like you're from the 80's... No, 70's... Like a mixture." Yaaaaaay!!), miniskirts, and all other sorts of things which other girls don't dare put on, for whatever reason. :/

What else was I going to say.... Ah, Ali, KK, and Alenya are with us for the weekend, since Ali has to do something involving the car... It's nice to see them again (after, oh, about a week), even if Alenya tried to spank me about five times within an hour. Why must we all torment Auntie Aya? D:

P.S.-- Apparently, no matter what I do, even if I "transcended God", to the rest of the world, I am merely a freshman to be pushed around until next year. Fuuuuuuuuun stuff, right? I AM SO GONNA SHOW YOU PEOPLE!! *anger.*

"He's Hungry for Love." Then why am I over here in the Corner, Eh?

2010-08-25T20:27:00.000-04:00

Just so y'all know, I made Mom a cake last night. And considering I usually don't cook... I think that helped matters. I think. I hope. I hopehopehope.

Today... Kinda usual, but still fun (it's sad how I have developed a "usual" without having even been in school for a week). I absolutely love Musical Theatre. It's also a great way to get to know people, 'cause it's a teamwork-requiring course, and our current groupwork, with eight members per team (I think), is getting to be very entertaining. Three of the class's four ~~men~~ boys are in my group, hahaha, and it's hilarious. Like Chris thinks the acronym "stfu" is some sort of STD... And Seth is married. And having an affair with me and some-guy-I-don't-know. He just doesn't know he's having an affair with me...

(Facebook. It tells you such marvelous things you never knew or did. Like how I'm ugly and how guys on Xbox can be such... Such.... Dude, I can't even explain it. Plus I found out Log Cabin syrup apparently sucks. However, I don't know whether or not this claim is true.)

Now I'm just... Blah. My homework is more interesting than the argument I'm in. And considering it's geometry homework, that's kinda sad... Maybe I'll just go do it.

Mrs. Westbrook: "-somethingsomething- If you want to steal somebody's heart, you write them a love song. -somethingsomething-"

Andrea: "Wouldn't it be easier to rip apart their chest and take it out from there..?"

Elizabeth: *gasp* "Hateful!!"

XDDD

It was Great, now it Sucks.

2010-08-24T18:05:00.000-04:00

So today is mom's birthday... And Ali seems to think I forgot. I'm sorry I didn't wanna wake her up.. More on that later. Go chronological order.

I've started to make some friends at school.. I don't know very many people, but enough to get by. I know another Seth now, too. Oddly enough, he's a theatre boy and his birthday's only a few days before little-Seth's. However, he's not so serious. In fact, he's the complete opposite. Plus he's tall. Sooooo weird.

Skip to English class, and I have Cody (yes, the one I've had for two years now) and Zachary, one of who is currently hating life, the other who thinks I'm hopeless. Which I am. Probably finds my ineptness at life amusing. Sadface, right?

Anyway, Ali called a while after I got home and thinks I forgot Mom's birthday this morning. And it turns out we can't really get Mom a birthday present because the glasses I chose were so freaking expensive. And blahblahblaaaaah I got it all for my birthday and such. And she said Mom was crying earlier.

Ya know what, I don't want 'em anymore. I don't want anything. Never celebrate my birthday, I won't freaking care. I'm gonna ask Dad if he can get a refund for what he already paid, and I won't get them. It'll make me sick to wear them. I feel sick right now just...

I don't know, living. I wish I had some sense of stability. But right when things start to look up, they fall back down. I have no anchor in life.

Spiders... They will Dominate the World...

2010-08-22T14:53:00.000-04:00

I've been noticing this for a couple of months now, but it's still really weird. On the branches of the trees, there are these webs, which I think are some sort of spiderweb. They envelop the end of the branch they're on, and they're much bigger than most I've seen, and sometimes I see up to twenty on a tree! Just think, if those things managed to completely cover all the branches of a tree, and even inbetween the branches, like a couple I've seen. Ohhh so creepy. I saw more than I would ever care to count on the way to Bridgeport yesterday.

In other news of typical West Virginian things, my grandpa seems to want to teach me how to drive the fourwheeler. I'm probably the only one in my community (scratch that, county, who can't, save for my mom), and the concept of driving ANYTHING seems to me like automatic suicide. But I'll try...

First two days, down. One hundred Seventy-Eight more to go!

2010-08-20T23:53:00.000-04:00

Most of the sophomores are telling me to admit that it sucks already. But it doesn't, it's actually very interesting. I've met... Oh, about six or seven people so far (not counting those in Madrigal). Three of them are from South, and they'll probably be the ones I see around the most (Frankie and I pass each other in the halls and wave like mad, don't ask me why, it just happened; Rhea and I have links together, aaaaand Zach is in English Pre-Honors with me. Seems very smart. o_o).

I am sooooo excited for the musical theatre season! I know our first show is a straight show, but since most of what I do in theatre involves singing, I don't know if I'll audition. But our second show will be Mulan, and I guarantee ya I'll be auditioning for that! Of course, I have to learn to dance first. I learned earlier while moving about the living room that I can move fine, my problem lies more in the directions confusing the eff outta me, along with low self-confidence in my movement.

I'm in Madrigal Choir, too, which I have instead of Chinese ~~not that Frankie doesn't keep trying to talk me into joining, though. I feel sort of sad that I'm not doing it. But I told him he should just teach me.~~, and it's also really fun. It's definitely a step up from the choir I was in during middle school, and the note reading is much more confusing, but I'll get the hang of it, I'm just out of practice. Honestly. I can do this.

No comment as to Geometry and English...

Blah. Much too lazy for any of this right now.

We are now Oriented.

2010-08-18T21:41:00.000-04:00

And tomorrow, I take my first steps into PHS as... Dundundun... A FRESHIE-MAN! Woohoo! Luckily enough, all my classes are near each other this semester. Unlike poor Nicole, whose are all around the place. We got a cute boy with a map (aka Frankie) to lead us to the Spanish room. Aaaaand Frankie's presence just ensued in awkward situations involving Lacey thinking he's like.. My soul mate, or something (which she has thought ever since the first time we saw him), and me turning strawberry red.

There's not too much to be said aside from that I MIGHT NOT ACTUALLY DIE! Wish me luck tomorrow!

Productive Day!? You must be Joking!

2010-08-17T23:45:00.000-04:00

We tore apart Ali's old room today. ... Okay, Ali did most of the actual tearing of carpet and linoleum and other lovely floor-covering materials. I mainly took things out of the room and tried not to pass out from the smell of mold (old house + ceiling leak in uninhabited room = BLACK MOLD. Which we could possibly get sick from...). But considering there was a mattress, a bed frame, and all other sorts of things in there, I think it accounts for something. Yes, Kevin helped with the mattress/bed frame/other heavier things. Excuse me for being a wimp.

Then we went to Dairy Queen! Wootwoot! And Wally World, 'cause I needed a notebook. Orientation is tomorrow. Hopefully I'll see Ali. Or Nicole. Hopefully I'll have Frankie's drawing finished (I knoooow a few days ago I just told you guys I didn't like drawing for people. But I couldn't heeeeeelp it, he was so excited and it was so dang CUUUTE. [Yeah, shuttup.] Plus we're both Kingdom Hearts fans so I figured I could theme it howsoever I please. Muahahahahaha.)

I think it all went very well. I, for one, am exhausted enough to go to bed before one o'clock! Maybe even midnight!

TearmeDown.

2010-08-17T00:39:00.000-04:00

I really should start sleeping earlier. School starts Thursday, like *boom* all suddenly. And I love it. I NEED TO GO BACK TO SCHOOL OR ELSE I WILL IMPLODE.

No, not because I am a nerd of epic proportions. I am dying for some human contact. My lack of socializing over the summer has left me to wither and ponder my own existence. Maybe there's a REASON nobody invited me to do anything over the summer. Maybe I'm a figment of everybody's imagination, and I will die once everybody forgets about me.

Which would, by the way, make my fear of being forgotten completely plausible.

My foot is asleep and I am receiving internet counseling on life. Wonder how this'll end up... Wish me luck.

Stoppit, really.

2010-08-15T19:49:00.005-04:00

Alenya's high-pitched "princess" voice is starting to irritate me. It does NOT make one sound like a princess, it just makes my ears hurt. If your voice is unnaturally high-pitched n' squeaky, you better be in the midst of singing lessons. Otherwise, you're making my ears bleed. Go away. Also, please stop randomly screaming. I knooow you're Filipino and therefore stereotypically loud, our entire family is, but if you absolutely must scream, then lower your pitch, please and thank you.

While we're at it, why don't we just list off different things I hate (ooh, boy)?

RANT TIEM.

I hate it when people on Facebook can't get the hint that you don't wanna talk to 'em. If I want to talk, I will RESPOND. Even if you send only one message, I WILL EVENTUALLY GET IT. I don't like receiving the same "heyy" fifty times over. Which brings us to another pet peeve...

If you're going to make conversation, please, PLEASE have something to say, or admit in some lengthy, elaborate way that you have no idea and would like for me to start something. And don't just reply with "lol" or "idk" or "yeah/ya/yea/whatever your personal preference is of spelling that word" or something I cannot work off of. Make yourself worthy of my attention, hokay!?

I like grammar, too. I understand if you're not a great speller, I also understand the occasional misspelling for effect's sake, but TRY, for my eyes' sake. Don't give me "i cn do wat i want, free contry, dnt u give me gref bout not spellin rite ur blahblahblah isnt spelled rite! tat pisses me off!!! u nerd no boys evar gunna luv u cuz dey all after MIIIIII, when im married and ur alone youll think to urself mayb i shouldnt be such a grammer freak bout everything. so stick tat!" ... Seriously. What the heck. I am too astounded to even laugh hysterically. So maybe this is more of a "wooooow hahahaha you fail life" moreso than an annoyance. By the way... I really was told by some chick nobody would ever want to marry me because of my grammar freakish-ness. Yaaaaay!

I hate it when people use their online statuses to announce who their "bestie" is. ESPECIALLY when they a) have a new one every week, and/or b) stab said bestie in the back mere weeks, days, HOURS afterward.

I hate when people take their fandom much too seriously. Okay. So I don't like... Say, Twilight. This does not mean I deserve to be sparkled to death.

I also hate when people assume I like Yu-Gi-Oh simply because I like anime, or think that all anime is like Pokemon. It's like saying all sports must involve balls to a swimmer. ~~Or a female, dependin' on your context.~~

I hate bullies who pick on you beginning in fourth grade and never give up. I know I'm Filipino, look like I'm growing a mustache, like anime/manga, am smarter than the rest of you, talk really fast, like boys (from football players to emos to nerds) even though I'm not popular or slutty, am slightly paranoid, have a flash temper, and like gays and Black people. Now stop making fun of me for it.

I hate those blocks in Tetris that will never fit anywhere that won't screw up my lines. Yeah, to the left. Doesn't that just BUG YOU when you're doing awesomely on level eight, and then all suddenly a z-block comes outta nowhere and you have no place to put it? I have nightmares 'bout these things.

A certain pink-haired Air Gear character named Simca. Yes world, it is that bad.

I don't necessarily HATE it, but I don't really like it when people constantly! Ask me! To draw them! For the love of Fai, I barely know you. Why should I. But then I have to make some sort of excuse, so I'm not rude, but I really don't want to draw people who will never talk to me again.

I hate it when people call me over to do a favor every two minutes. Mom, why didn't you just tell me to do that before I walked back over to the sunroom and sat back down to rant about how much I HATE MY LIFE. FUMMEL.

I hate that I have such a hard time with serious subjects.

I hate seeing the same piece of Flair fifty times over.

I hate how in the Christian community, Atheist = "SATAAAAAAAN, BEGONE, O-RUBBISH-OF-THE-EARTH. I DON'T WANT YOU TO EAT MY BBYSSSSS (couldn't help it...)," and Atheists think Christians = "f*cking bigots, try to convert me, well ya know what, ALL MY FRIENDS WILL BE IN HELL (thus defeating the purpose of Hell?) and all you know is a load of bullshit, I laugh at your naivete." Can't we all live and let live?

I hate love triangles. I hate being involved in love triangles when I don't know who the other girl is. I don't like it when boys like me. This makes me hopeless!

Insensitive people make me cry. Or want to walk to Maryland and beat 'em up.

I hate cliche fashion statements. Which might be hypocritical of me to say, 'cause I'm usually seen as a borderline scene girl (even though I always though poofy choppy hair and raccoon eyeliner were a REQUIREMENT for that, neither of which I have). But anyway... I think animal print is generally hideous and trashy... Skinny jeans get boring after a while ~~okay, I own a few pairs anyway...~~, and Ugg boots... NO. JUST NO, PLEASE. Shutter shades ~~this means you, Nyles *death glare.* And all my classmates who bought shutter shades in DC.~~. Blinds are made for windows, not your eyes. I hate seeing people who dress insanely alike in gigantic mobs. Which is more my problem than anything... In other words... Walking fashion trend? Urrrrrp. And yes, my older sibling and brother-in-law do make fun of me. Whatwith the whole "nerd" uprising (and honey dear, I really find it hard to believe your "I ♥ nerds" shirt when I see those super-short shorts underneath 'em. Leave my Cody be, dangit, ONLY NICOLE TRULY LOVES HIM!), they say "Oh look Andrea, you're not special anymore!".

And this is why I love my family.... By the way, happy late birthday Kevin! YOU'RE AN OLD MAN NOW, YIPEEEE!! You better have liked my present, haha. Or I will eat your soul.

... Sorry you had to see that. :D

:/

2010-08-13T01:24:00.000-04:00

I don't really know what to write about... Or if I should at all.

I went to a funeral and the mall yesterday. Why that odd combination? I blame my mother. For the last part, anyway. She was in no way responsible for the funeral.. Once again, a church member. We're pretty much dropping like flies, and really, we don't have too many younger members.

Makes me sad. I'm sorry I can't really type elaborately and such right now, but I'm--well, I'm nothing. Or something. *shrugs.*

I Think it's just a Normal Teenage Thing.

2010-08-09T01:34:00.000-04:00

I've become such a drama queen, it's not even funny... I just want to explode, leaving green gooey Andrea-guts all over the place. Surely they'd adapt better to the earth than I have so far. ~~Why did that make me think of James and the Giant Peach?~~ As the title implied, I'm at the least hoping it's just a phase... Ugh... There's one reason to grow up... Not that I like turning fourteen in two weeks either way. No, don't bother remembering, it's all good.

I'm sad, I'm lost, I'm lonely, and really, I just wonder how I take it anymore. What makes it even worse is that I don't know why, and still don't know. Really. I've been like this long enough, you'd think I'd have come up with SOMETHING by now.

By the way... I watched Inception a couple of days ago, with Ali, Kevin, two of their friends, and Dave. I liked it quite a bit, and it wasn't nearly as mindscrew-y as I'd expected it to be. Especially considering I can usually only follow things when they're written. Go me! I've also watched The Princess and the Frog more times than necessary. It's led to my thinking a lot about what I want vs. what I need.

I think I need to be an asexual, so I can stop fretting so much over boys I'd never have a chance. I'm so typical, aren't I? Getting depressed over a boy, added on to the usual moodiness. Or is that just another want? Even if one that would make life QUITE CONVENIEEEEEENT.

Eh. Screw pretty boys. I have books.

Whoah.

2010-08-08T17:49:00.002-04:00

Somebody needs to remind me to post. Like seriously. If only I weren't so blank all the time...

Sneezes.

2010-07-23T03:48:00.001-04:00

So, we're leaving around four in the morning. I'm going to just sleep in the car so I don't have to wake up with a mere two hours of sleep. So, while I wait, I'm gonna write 20 things about myself that I think you don't know, but chances are you already do, and I just like to think I'm more mysterious than I really am. Which, honestly, isn't much at all.

So, here are the rules, folks, if ya wanna do this.

1. Fill out your own 20 things about you that most people didn't know on your blog.
2. On the same post, make sure to include the rules, and a link back to the blog that tagged you.
3. Tag the bloggers you'd like to know 20 new things about.

I was tagged by Christopher of The Chin Scratcher and The Nerd Archives, and, frankly, I love these sorta things. Maybe I'm conceited or something.

1. I am plagued by constant headaches during the summer months, due to my horrible sleeping patterns. But I don't go to bed anyway. I probably shouldn't divulge the supposed reason, since nothing's really official, but I can at least say that I have hard times falling asleep, and when left unoccupied, my mind tends to wander into nightmarish affairs.

2. I don't like talk of religion very much. It's interesting, but often makes me feel highly uncomfortable, 'cause it's all faith. Now, I'm not so much one to listen to fact over feeling, but I just don't get it.

3. I will only dance on the stage, on a mat with arrows, or in the dark with my iPod, usually to Hanson (yes I said HANSON. Judge me.).

4. I use the word "whore" more than I should. Probably because I am lacking in insulting skills. Whether that's a good or bad thing, you decide.

5. I've wanted to be a decent amount of things ever since I was little. Oddly enough, though, I have never ever wanted to be a doctor, no matter what my mom tried to convince me about their wages and all. This is because I don't like working with people very much ~~I know, I'm screwed.~~.

6. I don't really understand all the hype surrounding Ugg Boots, skinny jeans ~~although I wear them anyway~~, Twilight, Justin Bieber, California, the phrase "rawr", vegeterianism (steak = love), cupcakes and most other generally cute things people put the phrase "emo", "scene", "bloody", "hardcore", or other violent and/or depressing adjectives in front of; and cell phones, among other things.

7. I live off that satisfactory feeling you get in Algebra class when you understand things that the rest of the class doesn't. Conversely, I hate it when I can't understand things after thinking them over for an hour while I should be doing something else, or when I'm treated as if I don't understand when I understand it 100%.

8. It's been speculated that my family has a Latino fetish, and if you really believe that, then I suppose I am no exception. Latinos often show up in my dreams, too. Like a specific Puerto Rican... And none of these dreams are romantic/sexual, thank you very much, AARON. Grr.

9. I can be a complete attention whore. I use reverse psychology when it's becoming obvious, though. I'll run away and see if you care enough to chase. If not, I'll probably be really bitter and depressed, 'cause as histrionic as I am, I don't care enough about myself to the point where I'm self-absorbed. I really care a lot about people, and when those same people don't care so much about me... I guess it's just upsetting.

10. I try to speak like an intelligent person, but I also have this West Virginia redneck-y accent that sometimes emerges in both my writing and my speech.

11. I have a misogynistic streak... Or maybe just jealousy issues...

12. It depresses me to read these and see just how negative a person I am.

13. Maddy and I want Quinton Flynn TomToms. Or maybe Morgan Freeman... You don't dare disobey Morgan Freeman, foo'.

14. I love kitties. I mean, I don't think I'll want ninety-five of them when I'm seventy years old and that crazy cat lady that all the neighborhood kids poke fun at (or so that's what I tell you I'll be when you say you have no luck with girls. Get the hint already, darnit!), maybe just one. Ali's neko (she comes from Japan) is in our house right now. She's a sweet kitty, even if she tends to bite my hands.

15. I am a walking clothing rack. I'm nearly always overdressed, and supposedly rather ridiculous looking. That being said, I managed to avoid packing my "hooker boots" with my things I am taking to Alabama!

16. If you're one who takes your Western horoscopes literally (which I am not, but thought this was interesting), I contradict it, because I am a Leo, and yet, many of my friends/along with three random guys who I'm friends with that like me at one point are Capricorns. Apparently that's a no-no.

17. I am always formulating different stories, scenes, scenarios, and characters in my head, but when I finally sit down to write it all out, I go blank, and the words are all lost in a sea of static. Adding to that, when I imagine things, they are usually anime-style and involve a lot of ninja-like actions.

18. I have owned this Winnie the Pooh pillow since I was one year old, and no matter how skeletal it may seem, I ain't givin' it up anytime soon.

19. My cure for carsickness is gummi worms. And while we're on food, I will eat any amount of rice (no matter that it sometimes feels like I'm choking) and different varities of meat, and I eat so much that I should be 200 pounds, but I'm only around 105 right now (oh noes, I've lost!). I also refuse to drink anything aside from water and orange juice unless I have no other option whatsoever and I am absolutely starving.

20. I have few set goals in life, I have more "that was awesome!!" moments along the way, but I swear, one day I shall write a fantasy novel. And it will be epic.

Now, I don't have much time to tag y'all, we're about to begin loadin' up to go to Alabama, but hopefully some of you will see this. ANYWAY. My tag-ees who are hopefully reading are

Maddy

Aaron

Courtney

Josh

Bleah

Abby

Nicole (yeah you. Blog for once!!)

and any of my Sporks Are Useless girls who may be reading!

Well, I have to go. Ciao, hopefully I'll be here next week!

I'm Horrible.

2010-07-22T13:00:00.000-04:00

Sorry guys, I haven't really felt up to posting lately. Besides, it's unlikely you needed PMS-y, bitter, wants-to-dump-somebody-into-a-deep-dark-not-necessarily-maggoty-hole Andrea in your life. But I'm better now. Almost all is resolved.

So, while I was out, you missed almost nothing. All you missed is my random breakdown, Aaron and Cassie telling me either that it'd be better, that I really need to learn to let things go, or that I'm an idiot. Of course, the middle didn't happen, but I'm more stable now. Hopefully.

So, of importance that was missed... Friday, I went with the father parental unit to see Little shop of Horrors. I had friends from Brigadoon and The Fabulous Fable Factory in it, and it was sooooo nice to see them again, after being cooped up in the house ever since Ali left. Brooklyn *squee*d as soon as she saw me. Nice to know I was missed... I guess it was a reassurance to them to have me in the front-row audience. This performance wasn't in the high school auditorium, like the others, but rather, in the barn at Ridgeview, and it was sooo cool, because we were RIGHT THERE. It's really easy to tell when someboody's making eye contact with you, and I found it a little unnerving. But it was a friend of mine from school, so, it's all good.

I won't spoil the details of the show, but let me tell you, it can be hilarious at times, but it's some pretty dark humor, and the dentist was fairly creepy at some points... Eh, just go find a performance of it sometime. Hopefully it'd be as good an experience for you as it was for me.

I'm going to be gone starting Friday until Wednesday or Thursday, as I'll be in Alabamaaaa, visiting my great aunt and... Cousin, I think? But anyway, I'll be gone until then, and if I figure out some way to scrounge up 75$ by the 31st, I will be going to Otakon. However, this is highly unlikely. Nonetheless, I've been looking at cosplays, and some recommended ones for me were Rubi Toujou (Rosario + Vampire), Julia Chang (Tekken), and Kogumi Nakahara (Nurse Witch Komugi). However, it's been noted if I did the last, I'd "get raped as soon as I walked out the door", to put it simply. Stupid old men with their stupid loli fetishes.

Haaaaaaaaaappy Shane's Birthday.

2010-07-04T14:26:00.001-04:00

And fourth of July, of course! I'm honestly a proud American, glad I live here. No matter that I think Japan would also be a nice place... But anyhoozles. Be a patriot, and go to your cookouts.

I wish family were more of an American value than it seems to be sometimes. Even I'm sort of distant... But here, like with my entire church, we're closer than I bet a lot of people are. It's depressing to see how distant people can be anymore, especially family and neighbors. But I don't know where I'm going with this.

And I suppose it's a bad place to post that I nearly ripped a guy's hair out last night because it looked too much like somebody else's? And fell face-first into a ditch? They looked like somebody who, thanks to Aaron (okay... I asked him to help, but NONETHELESS. Sorry for any confusion.), I am talking to AGAIN? ~~Cassie seems to think I'm an idiot for it. I do too.~~ But who needs that ruining their day, hmm?

Enjoy your country's birthday!! I wonder when we finally cross that line from "baby country", since we're so young, to "mature, respected, non-temperamental country". Hm...

400th post.

2010-06-27T03:34:00.000-04:00

Wow. We've come that far, huh? And while I REALLY don't want to overshadow my last post, which has left me utterly perplexed, and I am STILL trying to understand it (yes, that is me shamelessly begging you to read it), these are two wonderful, touching, and sometimes shocking and heartbreaking sites that I'd appreciate it if you visited.

http://www.sixbillionsecrets.com

-and-

http://givesmehope.com

I have wanted to cry all day. And these have both kept me from doing so, and pushed me toward so. Thank you, Cassie, for making me visit them. Means a lot.

Your Eyelids are your Canvas; I can only imagine what you're painting.

2010-06-26T18:03:00.003-04:00

I rarely dream. And when I do, I only see bizarre images, usually involving anime, mass warfare, and death. And I only see, never feel. But last night... That's not what it was. I could honestly feel the dream around me, and it wasn't macabre or bizarre (in the usual sense, anyway). It simply was what would never be.

I don't know how this started, and I don't know how to describe it sufficiently. In fact, I feel ridiculous trying to do so. I also feel ridiculous for thinking it'll make any difference, but here we go.

My former-ish friend was at my house. I don't know specifically why, I get the feeling my sister had something to do with it.. But, reasons aside, he was there. And I think this was after what I said and did last night (which, really, didn't tell him anything, but it wasn't supposed to anyway), because I felt pretty guilty about it (which seems to be how I feel about everything lately), but somehow... It didn't bother him. Or maybe it wasn't afterwards, because I've had it on my mind for a while now. I would've felt terrible, absolutely terrible and heartless had this occurred while I was still debating on letting him go.

But anyway, despite everything that may or may not have occurred, he seemed... Happy. It's hard to write about this because I don't want to think about it too long. Like it'd lose what it meant. But there, in those few moments... He just held me. And I could feel it. The warmth of his chest which my head laid upon, and his arms around me, and the comfort and safety that came from him in the moments of that brief dream...

I kept trying to apologize for what had been on my mind lately, trying to forget him... But it seems like every time, the words came out wrong. The air... Like it hushed me. And even if I had managed to say what had been invading my mind every time little distractions left, something tells me it wouldn't have mattered. Like he would've hushed all my worries, somehow. Like he used to.

It seems sort of surreal, like I consciously made it up, but I know I only dreamt it, and I know I felt it.

Made me think of this song... For some reason, it comes across to me as one of the sweetest songs I've ever heard. No matter that it was all a lie.

Well, I'm an idiot.

2010-06-25T15:05:00.000-04:00

It's just one catastrophe after another nowadays. And I wish I could stop going on about it, but my selfish-ass self can't seem to stop whining lately. Ugh, I'm sorry, you guys deserve better. Maybe I could just stop blogging (and accessing the internet in general) until life lightens up. Whenever that is.

So, my sister is moving out. Aaaaaand it's my fault. I went on a rant the other day about how I couldn't handle her children. Let's face it, I'm a baby-child. No younger siblings, and despite helping babysit, all the time gets pretty frustrating, especially when they've inherited the Filipino decibel level and hardheadedness. And moreover, they don't listen. That drives me insane beyond belief. Feels like barely anybody listens to me, not even kids... And maybe I'm just sick of kids trying to spank me, calling me stuff, and in general TRYING to annoy the living life out of me. And I am sorry to admit that, but I am honestly not that patient, and not very good with children, let alone anybody at all.

I'm sorry.

And today, Ali was gonna go to funeral (that's not today, I don't know when it was), but when she asked Mom if we could watch the girls, Mom flipped out on her, and I guess basically told her the same thing I did. And that she's always doing everything for her friends, but when the situation turned around, who would be there for her? Or something like that. I only know what I overheard and the very little that Ali told me.

And so maybe if I hadn't started all this shiiiiiit, we wouldn't be in this situation, with Ali packing, then staying with Amanda, and then staying in Navy Lodging until they got a house up in Maryland... And I don't know when that'll be.

I'm the reason Ali and the girls came to stay with us in the first place... I don't wanna be the reason they're leaving. But I don't know what to DO. I've already managed to screw an entire world of things up, going off on my rant and not even being home half the time, and being exceedingly grumpy when I am.

I don't know what to do, I don't know what to say, and frankly, I don't much wanna tell anybody specifically because either they won't care or understand or be any help at all, or I've already loaded so much of my problems onto them that to do so anymore... Would really feel like taking advantage of them. I know I already said this, but I'm sorry....

Hooooo Sah-nap!

2010-06-25T02:49:00.000-04:00

So, guess what I didn't do. Dedicate a post to my lovely father on FATHER'S DAY. Really Andrea. Really!? *bangs head off wall.*

So I would like to take this time, 2:43 in the morning, to dedicate to my wonderful father (who, by the way, never stays up this late). Dad, I have never met a person who didn't like you (aside from possibly me at times? But I'm your spawn, I don't count), and darn if I ever do. Nonetheless, you're quite impatient. Shockingly. Maybe the one trait that connects me to you at all, because as Paco says, you're much friendlier than I am. :< Anyhoozles... What else can I say... Your slow driving has possibly saved my life? Like when we... Kinda sorta drove into a cow... Yeah.

And the moral of this story is: Love your dad, no matter that he's an old man and drives like one, too.

find YOUR muse.

2010-06-24T02:09:00.000-04:00

As you can see, I thought a change of name was in order. Ya see, I'm not exactly random anymore, and I'm not sure if I miss that part of me or not.

But I seem to find myself.... Well, trying to find inspiration. And flailing about uselessly, having not found it, and rather frustrated by this sad fact. But maybe I will one day.

One day I'll find my muse. Or maybe create it. I'm not quite sure. Which is probably a good thing.

"Forget."

2010-06-23T23:19:00.000-04:00

That's the word that's been on my mind.

Right about now, I want to forget it all. I want to go away, stop causing everybody so much grief and frustration and blahblahblah. And I want somebody to physically hurt me, beat me up. I guess then I'd have a reason to feel so horribly pathetic and useless, with a broken bone or a bruised face. But then I'd be blaming me on emo-ousity on somebody else.

When it's really all my own problem. And that means I must deal with it myself. Unless I decide to run away again, as usual. I don't think I could handle being separated from everyone and everything, but wherever that could be sounds like an almost-comforting place right about now.

"RIP" Shouldn't make me Think of Ripped Pants.

2010-06-22T22:44:00.000-04:00

Saturday, right after my last The Fabulous Fable Factory performance, I was informed a forever-member of my church, Erwin, had been in an accident involving a tractor flipping over on him. I was startled, but hoped he would be okay. Early the next morning (by morning, I mean about 2 A.M. while I was doing I-kinda-forget-what), Ali called the house and told us... He died.

I didn't really wanna believe it, because to imagine somebody, gone from the Earth, is a really hard concept to grasp. Nobody fully and completely understands, because they have not experienced death, because when they DO, they can't come back and tell us what it's like! Dx

So I am really saddened and shocked by all this... Cassie and I were talking about it on MySpace the two afternoons ago, when she went to church with us, we would always tease him with the candy the younger kids received at the end of Sunday School, because Erwin loooooved candy and food (whenever we had Sunday School lunches [which trust me, was and still is pretty often], he was always one of the first in line, and everybody knew it! It got to be a sort of joke). And when I went up to his casket today for a final look, I saw... One of his family members had put a York peppermint patty in his hand, and I couldn't help but giggle a little bit.

I'm optimistic about him, ;cause he was a strong Christian. And if there is a God (which I like to think there is, but I don't think about it nearly as much as I should), Erwin rests with him. <3.

Oh, while we're on this subject, Sunday, after my family returned home from whichever-airport-they-picked-Ali-up-at, I was bawling my eyes out, so Ali, in a (successful) effort to cheer me up, told me about a Filipino custom. When a person dies, they are kept in the house for nearly two weeks. And during those two weeks, people will come and visit, and people will play around the body and everything. But strangest of all, during those same two weeks, there must always be someone awake in the house at all times. So, guess what crackpot theory Ali came up with? ZOMBIE WATCH. And also, when somebody in our house dies, we're just gonna clear off the coffee table, set whoe3ver's dying upon it, and break out a game of Scattergories.

We are also compiling a list of things we want to be buried with. The horror, right?

I'm Married.

2010-06-18T23:57:00.000-04:00

To Anna, fellow The Fabulous Fable Factory cast member. Just thought I might letcha all know.

I think it's getting to be a bit of a trend among cast members. Started by Abby and Brooklyn. xD Tonight was picture night, after the performance. Definitely went smoother than Friday, we all had the opening night heebie-jeebies.

You need some pictures of my oversized coat from being a merchant. You really do. Anyway... EXHAUSTION.

*dies a little inside.*

Will you buy my Story? Its Moral is About Beyonce.

2010-06-16T22:51:00.000-04:00

Tomorrow is the opening night for The Fabulous Fable Factory!! I'm completely PSYCHED about it all. Because we are more! Interesting! THAN TV!! We've worked insanely hard since before school ended, and it all accumulates to THESE LAST THREE NIGHTS.

So, the story is pretty much all about Monroe, this kid who finds an abandoned factory, only to discover it is a fable factory which can no longer function because it is missing an important part of its machine, the Moral Maker. And so... What else would they do besides..?

AND YOU GET THE POINT. It's silly, but that's the point.

There's been soooo much love and laughter shared in the creation of this production. <3. Which is why I hope it is destined to ROOOOCK.

Lovely. Absolutely Lovely.

2010-06-13T19:36:00.001-04:00

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid:	Moderate
Schizoid:	High
Schizotypal:	High
Antisocial:	Low
Borderline:	Low
Histrionic:	Moderate
Narcissistic:	Moderate
Avoidant:	Moderate
Dependent:	Moderate
Obsessive-Compulsive:	High
-- Personality Disorder Test -- -- Personality Disorder Information --

Muy muy interesante, don'tcha think?

I miss Reason. Which is a lot Coming from me.

2010-06-11T21:48:00.001-04:00

So how come every time my dearly beloved Aaron gets a girlfriend, he chooses an overcontrolling one who decides she doesn't like Cassie and I? I got what was coming to me, but WHAT ON EARTH DID CASSIE EVER DO WRONG TO HIM. She was always the one there supporting him when he went through his melodramatic depressions, always trying to show him reason without being blunt, always trying to make sure he was okay.

I don't know what made him like this... But if he's gonna be like this, then he doesn't deserve my best friend in the LEAST. He deserves better than what he's got, but nobody deserves Cassie. I certainly don't.

And he says he wants to be a hero to that girl, well, he was more of one before he put on that blinding armor. What good is trying to be impenetrable if you can't see? Even worse if you won't listen to reason. Why are heroes always more... Well, heroic before they realize it? I once considered Aaron my hero. I'd trust him with anything. My personality's actually quite a bit like his was, I spent so much time around him that he wore off. But now it's all girls and paranoia and trying to please only one person.

I say damn that princess in her tower.

Don't Compare him to Patrick Swayze. Don't do It.

2010-06-10T20:43:00.001-04:00

Ali has (I've had) The time of my Life (yes, from Dirty Dancing) stuck in my head now. THANK YOU, OH LOVELY BEST FRIEND. Umm, so... Came to stunning conclusion whatwith Nyles in all his Nyles-ness. Because I am a freakin' genius.

Maybe this is the beginning of like... A new LIFE CHAPTER, or something. Which would make sense.

Dude. I don't Believe it. I Simply Don't.

2010-06-09T02:08:00.000-04:00

WHERE HAS THIS YEAR GOOOOONE!? HUH!? HUH!? SOMEBODY TELL ME AND TELL ME NOW, DANGIT. And arrange some stuff.

Today was our last day, and it doesn't seem like it, to be honest. I feel like I should roll outta bed tomorrow at six as usual and start panicking to make it to the bus on time. In possibly "normal" clothing (i.e., jeans, t-shirt, hoodie), because apparently some "influential men" at the Board office think I dress "cute" but "wouldn't recommend" wearing my lacy (by this I dunno if lace in general or just fishnets was intended) tights, as it makes me look "cheap". Cheap. And guess what these men did? TOLD MY GRANDMOTHER (she's often in contact with educational higher-ups) TO RELAY THIS BACK TO ME. WTFH. Okay, not wanting me to wear lacy tights to school is one thing, BUT ASKING MY GRANDMA TO TELL ME. REALLY. fhgohohgfoihbfgdo =.=; Now I'm tempted to stop dressing like me altogether just to be spiteful. PROTEST. PROOOOTEST. I look like less of a whore than so many other girls, anyway! D<. I know I don't have to listen if I don't want to, but why do old men care about how I dress as long as I'm not flashin' 'em, anyway?

My anger over this nearly prompted me not to attend the End of School Dance... That and the fact somebody moved my outfit for it. Not that I didn't look epic either way (because I am MADE of gorgeous /blatant lie). But I ended up going either way after rehearsal (btw, MUCHOS gracias to Leah for transporting me to and fro), and I don't regret it. Not one bit. ^.^ ~~Yeah, bet you're wondering now.~~

So, I actually got recognized at the ceremony. Most artistic (despite that Nikki was the Eagle of that book cover... Murf.), Principal's Honor Roll (one B the entire year. ORHGOEHGOE NOOOOOOOOES. T^T.), Math Field Day, Golden Horseshoe, and Exemplary Choir... I want to say participation, but just some word that makes me sound big and important. :p

Hold on, Addy won't stop jumping on me, so I must feed her...

Whenever I talk about Addy, I feel like people think I'm typo'ing "Maddy" and wondering "why the heck is your pet named Maddy?" or something along those lines. But I now officially know TWO Maddys! And they both rock my stripey thigh high socks. There's Maddy-moo with her sane insanity, and then Maddy. Who is replacing me as eighth grade's resident bizarrely AMAZING girl. Because there must be one. Or else. We will perish. (Cassie, of course I still loves you more than anybody. But you're perhaps a taaaad more like Ali than me.)

But anyway, at the aforementioned dance, I ended up dancing with Nicole (who Cody was really missing out on, honestly. So shy tsktsk. WORSE THAN ME!), Ali, Maddy, Erin, and a one Brian (yeah, never heard of HIM before, have we?) over the course of 7:30--10:00. Mainly to slow songs because I. Can't. Dance. But I still did the chacha slide, if it accounts for ANYTHING. I'm more of a singer, as known by now. So I just started singing everything I could. And Maddy says I'm a failed dancer, and she broke up with me when we were done. Then we ~~TUSSLEEEEEED :D~~... Okay, we'll go with "tussled", because there is no better word for fake fist-fighting. xD And don't get your hopes up about Brian, people. That was all Ali's fault ~~like I wasn't pining after him all night...~~ and really sort of... Y'know, I dunno if I was surprised or not. :/.

I AM JUST THAT UNPERCEPTIVE. *thumbs up.* Well, have a happy summer guys. I still have another week of caaaamp! And then I'm gonna go move in with Megan er something. Ohh... Ali leaves to Cali tomorrow. Which means the parentals and I have the girls. Oh ye God, please save us all.

I should stop.

2010-06-06T03:54:00.000-04:00

Still no word on what happened last night.

So, I was originally going to blog about auditions yesterday but didn't have the heart. But nonetheless, I think they went well. *faintsmiles.* I actually decided to sing a song from The Little Mermaid out of panicked need. Ali would be proud. And it went very well. Apparently I have a "cute" voice. I usually find it simply annoying, but okies.

Dancing, however. Not too great. But I only messed up twice, I think...

Handsome, Well-Spoken, his Heart can't be Broken... Or was it Already?

2010-06-05T00:46:00.004-04:00

I just heard something really unsettling, and while it's unconfirmed and Chloe and I may just be putting two and two together to equal three, we're still worried.. I'm feel like I'm gonna be sick.

Let's Throw Jell-O atchur face.

2010-05-27T20:28:00.000-04:00

jggfkfgngh48d s iiiii

^^Exclusive keyboard smash, brought to you by Andrea's niece Kaitlyn.

Well... Last night, for anybody wondering, I guess I wondered a few things I shouldn't have, said a few things I shouldn't have, and now I don't know how to apologize for 'em. I wish I could sooner, tomorrow's special. But I don't know when I'll be able to... I honestly think I'm making too big a deal of things, but I think he's still at the least annoyed with me. I'm not really emo-ing over it anymore... But still kind of icky.

I'm sooo excited about our play now. Just worried about some of the dancing. In order of things I am competent at which are required for musical theater, here we are: 1) singing, 2) acting, 3) dancing. Possibly two and three mixed up, but I think we can just say I am a singer and most definitely not a dancer or an actress. No matter what Cassie says. :p But nonetheless, we are coming along great and shockingly enough, I fit into our great big youth theater family almost seamlessly. YAAAAY I love you guys. *happy crying.*

Less than two weeks until I am officially no longer a junior high kiddo. Ali said the next two weeks will be the easiest of our lives until retirement, and I wonder if she's right or not. It's not particularly something I like to think about... Either way, most of my friends are very indifferent to the transition, but I'm all sorts of screwed up because some people, two of my favorite people in the woooorld especially, a miss Cassie and mister Sethy, I may never go to school with again or see for forever, in Seth's case definitely. Darn your sixth grade-ness. SKIP A GRADE, DARNIT. Oh, and in the field of unrelatedness, I realized people touching me is a major pet peeve of mine. Sure, there are exceptions, like the tap-tap shoulder game and hugs (oh how I love hugs), but otherwise I just start getting annoyed. ESPECIALLY when people play with my hair. There's really nothing that amazing about it.

I am now the logical one in Spanish class... Only I make sense. Or talk with sense. I dunno. But I did get convince Criser to take us outside tomorrow... WIN. Where nobody else prevails, I succeed. WITH ONE SENTENCE. MUAHAHAHA. TODAY SPANISH CLASS. TOMORROW, THE WORLD. :D

P.S.-- Muse's picture is actually... Muse. Now. O.o So cliche.

I hope you hate me/Attentionless.

2010-05-27T06:34:00.000-04:00

I'm still wondering what that last word was for last night. Maybe I was much too defensive. Maybe I should've waited. MAYBE I should'nt've started anything at all... I think this was a bad idea all along, but I can't seem to bring myself to

give up the ghost.

Perhaps that is a good--no... Not it's not...

What's this to you, Anyway?

2010-05-26T21:55:00.002-04:00

Let's not talk about it.

Down the Yellow Brick road to the Horrors of HIGH SCHOOL. D:

2010-05-25T23:13:00.000-04:00

It couldn't be all that bad, I thought. Just a new school with more people?

Well...............

I WAS RIGHT. SOMEHOW RIGHT. I should go out and buy a lottery ticket, if I can be right for once! xD I'm fairly excited... When I get into high school this August (they're starting earlier this year, as our West Virginian amount of snow days causes us to never have the required 108 days, I hope we don't start on my birthday. That'd be one slap in the face.. "Hey, it's your birthday, SO LET'S THROW YOU IN THIS HUMONGOUS CROWD OF NEW PEOPLE."), my very first class may be Musical theater. May be. Preliminary schedules might change.

Uwaaaaaa, I'm scared of creepers, come to think of it. Such as the below.

Scene: Andrea is with Chelsea (a friend from The Fabulous Fable Factory), who is looking for some unnamed person. After wandering the concourse, Andrea is for some reason whistled at and finger-called (I don't want to say "fingered over", sounds off) by some.... Guy.

Random guy: Hey, how old are you?

Andrea: *bewildered.* Thirteen...

Random guy: Okay, that's all I need to know. You're too young.

Andrea: Oh-kaaaaay. O.o *walks back off, still utterly lost.*

And although this was my only actual encounter, I felt (male) eyes on me later while waiting for the shuttle... WHAT AM I, THE LAST PIECE OF CHEESECAKE IN THE FACTORY!? Stop eyein' me like that. And before I rant, I honestly do not think wearing miniskirts and lace tights with combat-y type boots would make one an automatic sexpot. ESPECIALLY if said one in the above generally looks like... Oh, a fourth grader? .____. PEDOPHILES.

Aside from that, the entire experience went well. Performances were amaaaaaaaaaaazing. I hope I can get into musical theater ensemble, and I'm auditioning for show choir next Wednesday. Yep, I'm all abouts teh music. :D I saw my Aaron there, too... YES, my cousin-ly big-box-of-stupid-with-a-pretty-face-plastered on Aaron. He's musical theater ensemble, which is like top drama/musical theater, methinks... Well, the boy's always had a penchant for drama and music. It was definitely nice to see him up there enjoying himself (as always, at least when the latest girl hasn't broken his heart). Learned about classes (how did I end up with Spanish AND Chinese? Uuuuuuuuurp.), blahblah almost NO classes with Ali. Mainly Nicole and Jonathan (who promptly decided he wanted to copy off of me in our classes togther. = w=; )

I think I'm rather loopy. As if there was something in the air at the high school. And I need REST. LA SIESTA. Tiredtiredtiiiiiiired.

I Forgooooooot. T_T.

2010-05-24T22:42:00.000-04:00

It's not a good idea to try and give yourself an ear piercing with the silver metal box containing the fire extinguisher box. Never try it. Ever. Don't even run near it with your lacrosse scoop trying to pick up the little red foam ball or else Grant will go in for it at the same time, you'll be closer to the wall, bang the right side of your head up on the box, and it'll burn like an absolute WHORE. D: And Grant'll run away, 'cause since you're the temperamental vicious little one who nearly tried to murder Jake barely five minutes, he's scurred. Horribly scurred.

IT STILL HURTS. D: (Really. I was crying it hurt so much. This coming from the one whose always being toppled by people TWICE HER SIZE. Now if only I wasn't such a wimp with emotions.)

I Sometimes Wonder what it'd be Like.

2010-05-24T22:35:00.000-04:00

^^I am talking about way too many things up there to even begin listing them.

Orientation (Little-worded as Step-up) Day is tomorrow... Where eighth graders infiltrate the high school! >D And the sixth grade, the junior high. What I'm left wondering, though, is if all the schools in the county are "stepping up" tomoooooorrow. 'Cause that'd kinda suck. I DON'T WANNA BE WITHIN TEN FEET OF JAKE. HE MAKES ME FEEL STUPID. JIDRHGIHKIDF D:. Seriously... Smart people my age make me feel highly insecure. Like.... I'll just close up and go hermit-style all day. No bueno. But I'm actually somewhat excited... Just remind me to keep an eye on David ( <.< ) and give Laura inspirational hugs for The Great Gatsby IN SPACE and we'll be all good.

I think my birthday present is going to be late... Nonono, not my own... I have to mail one out. Because I'm sort of stupid and silly and utterly crazy about (for lack of better term...) about all this. GOTTA DO IT. GOTTA FINISH. IN THE NAME OF ALL THAT BROUGHT ME THROUGH FEBRUARY. *epicmadFORREEEEEEEEALdetermination!!!it'll blow your head off.*

And THIS is how we know that I am a teenage girl. T_T. A title I am not always proud to bear...

Just a Reminder to Self.

2010-05-22T23:56:00.002-04:00

"Well, a certain person whom I have all the faith in the world in, whether he'll be great or not, once told me that everybody loves somebody who loves somebody else, but I know he's not entirely right.

SO. Now that we've cleared up that even those we idolize can be completely wrong, it means that the possibilities are always open for anything. OPTIMISM PAYS."